Did you ever try to find something even remotely Orthodox in your local superstore, gift shop, or bible book store? Chances are, you'll find all manner of things purporting to be spiritual, religious, new-fangled and Christian -- though nary even a wall calendar reflecting the Ancient Faith. Besides, what should you do when you do find one?

Can you imagine for a moment that all this revealed religion stuff is really, really real? Imagine, if you will, the Theotokos pondering things, like: Where is Christ the Savior? Fr. Joseph imagines and ponders his way toward answers in Part One of this special episode, "live" and edited, from Christ the Savior church in the Windy City.

Studies show that no matter how many people get on an elevator, riders move around to allow the same amount of space between themselves and each of the others. Some elevator riders stare at the numbers, some continue conversations, and others start superficial ones. Uh oh, someone just asked about Orthodoxy! You've got about 30 seconds (and a $100 prize riding on it); what do you say?

Fr. Danislav Gregorio visits the Orthodixie studio to plug his latest publishing efforts, a series of Great Books that cover bachelor fasting, Orthodox evangelism, patience, and mindless middle-aged mishaps (among other things—perhaps even the most important thing).

What do you say when a ten-year-old says, "My best friend is gay"? How 'bout cartoon friends, can they be gay? Fr. Joseph wades in where even Elmer Fudd dares tread in this first episode of a two part series on . . . well, you know what the topic is.

From Bert and Ernie to parents, kids, and a pope—Fr Joseph talks about the struggles and the goal of sexuality in part two of this two-part series.

What's the difference between Orthodox Christians' participation on the internet and, say, secular scoundrels? Sometimes, it seems, not much. In this encore episode, Fr. Joseph admits that his foot has been been in his mouth but his tongue is still in his cheek. in other words: "Let's be careful out there!"

What caused the Steelers' dynasty in the seventies? (Of course it was Fr. Joseph.) What caused 35,000 folks to pray the "Our Father" in a football stadium? (Of course it was the Supreme Court.) Tim Tebow caused quite a stir in the NFL. (Only the Perfect makes perfect.) And Fr. Joseph takes a bow (but how do you say "hiatus"?).

Fr. Joseph presents a snip of material that he and Steve Robinson are working on at the St George Cathedral (Wichita) men's retreat in Victoria, Kansas.

From Waiters to Ask Abouna, from Cups to Taylor the Latte Boy, from Living Water to Green Eggs & Ham . . . it must be Camp St Raphael "live" from Wagoner, Oklahoma! YaBoy!

Fresh from the Antiochian Clergy Symposium on "Medicine, Theology, and Healing," Fr. Joseph shares his thoughts on Jesus' healing of the paralytic, and that which matters most.

Fr. Joseph says, "I'll have you all know that I took time out from reading Scripture, visiting the sick, and saying my prayers to record this podcast—now with more banjo!"

In this episode, which features a guest appearance by Fr. Danislav Gregorio, Fr. Joseph intends to show a vagabond who's boss! Hard to explain, but it doesn't quite turn out as planned.

Is "Pokémon Go" a sign of the End Times, or are the pocket monsters really unintended Evangelists?

With the Fast upon us, Fr Joseph remembers longing for chocolate in Paradise. But that was then, this is Yuma.

Fr Joseph (with help from the Rolling Stones, the Beatles, and Beck) fears his upcoming trip to Mount Athos. I mean, if you were him, wouldn't you?

FYI, this episode is a gentle rant. It's not PC, but GTGFAT.

You ever had a wreck with the bishop in the car? Yeah, well, lemme tell ya before he does: I have!

Fools and their gold are soon parted.

Honey, Mead, Old Age and John the Baptist. You'll just have to listen to get the connection.

Today, Fr. Joseph is reading his fan mail and coming across some interesting questions!

You know how strange dreams can be when you're not sleeping in your own bed? Well this one ranks up there with the strangest but, as usual, Fr. Joseph has a very practical application.

The Theophany and House Blessings. What happens in the service, in our homes, and in our lives.

Fr Joseph, struggling toward humility in the first week of the Fast, tells of his first visit to Fasters Anonymous... and their curious theme song.

Fr. Joseph tackles the subject of "place" -- where we come from and where we're headed.  Your departed mom, your dad, sister, brother or spouse:  they are on that mysterious journey.  It’s only a better place if Love is there … let’s pray that includes all of us.

This episode includes an interview with Benedict Sheehan, the Director of Music at St. Tikhon's Seminary and the author of The Music Stand blog with Ancient Faith. He shares his thoughts on the state of our music and makes suggestions on how to improve it.

A priest friend of mine likes to say, "We may not have many, but we have them all!" In this episode, I describe some the of the things that make it hard for priests and laity to see eye-to-eye and try to make the case that it really is okay not to like everything about your priests or parishes in order to love, serve, and support them. (Please note that I am NOT defending pathological or abusive parishioners and priests; we deal with those rare situations in other episodes). Enjoy the show!

Listen as Fr. Anthony talks with Dn. Nicholas Denysenko, the Emil and Elfriede Jochum Professor and Chair at Valparaiso University, about his 2018 book The People's Faith; the liturgy of the faithful in Orthodoxy. Among other things, they discuss why it is important to listen to - and not just teach - the people and what can be learned when we do so (hint: it's more than an opportunity to figure out how to improve our catechesis). Enjoy the show!

Applying St. Gregory the Great to modern times, Fr. Gregory Jensen PhD and Fr. Anthony Perkins encourage us to turn isolation into solitude and solitude into peace; and to speak and listen to God in that peaceful silence. After a brief discourse into risk management under uncertainty, they share practical tips, learned from experience and holy tradition, on how to grow in Christ in the midst of the coronavirus. This podcast is the audio from Fr. Anthony's daily YouTube lifestream. (https://www.youtube.com/user/74snipe) Enjoy the show!

St. Paul's first epistle to Timothy is full of pastoral and vocational wisdom. This is awesome. Even more awesome? Getting St. John Chrysostom's teaching on it! The version read is from The Homilies of St. John Chrysostom, Archbishop of Constantinople, on the Epistles of St. Paul the Apostles to Timothy, Titus, and Philemon (The Oxford Translation, Edited, with Additional Notes, by Rev. Philip Schaff, D.D., LLD.).

St. Paul's first epistle to Timothy is full of pastoral and vocational wisdom. This is awesome. Even more awesome? Getting St. John Chrysostom's teaching on it! The version read is from The Homilies of St. John Chrysostom, Archbishop of Constantinople, on the Epistles of St. Paul the Apostles to Timothy, Titus, and Philemon (The Oxford Translation, Edited, with Additional Notes, by Rev. Philip Schaff, D.D., LLD.). Poor pronunciations are all Fr. Anthony, though! This chapter has some difficult teachings about the role of women in the Church (to include exegesis on the Fall). Enjoy the show!

Elissa explains how to help children who struggle with doubt about the existence of God.

Elissa encourages parents and Sunday school teachers to stress the importance of Pascha by sharing in its fullness the story that leads up to Christ's Resurrection.

Elissa reminds us that if God were fair, we would be in big trouble.

Elissa discusses the story of Abraham and Isaac and her favorite prayer for children.

Elissa tells the complete story of Noah's Ark to demonstrate how doing so can be used to teach children about why we go to—and participate in the disciplines of—the Holy Orthodox Church.

If you are fasting from meat and dairy products, but you are not praying, studying the word of God, and making an effort to show love and charity, then your fast looks a lot like the devil's fast.

Resolutions are compatible with Orthodoxy, especially when the goal is to grow closer to God. Does Christ radiate in you?

Elissa takes a look at a question from a friend: How do we handle it when an older child doesn't want to go to church? Can't we just worship from home? Why does it matter and how do you teach that?

Fr. Michael discusses fear of, and love for, God.

Fr. Michael encourages us to trust that God, as our coach, will teach us to float and to swim, knowing that He is our teacher, and His hands are beneath us.

Fr. Michael reflects on the life and death, and continuing life, of Annie, the grandmother of one of his parishioners.

Have you felt a lack of love from church leaders? Fr. Michael responds to a reader of his blog about a question related to his recent podcast about Abbess Thaisia: "I am struggling with much of the same issue in your excerpt posted from Thaisia in regards to discouragement with those in church leadership and a lack of love by those in the church."

If we want to see God, where do we begin? Archimandrite Aimilianos says that we must begin with what we can do. We can seek; we can come to God with longing. In other words, if you want to see God, you have to want to see God. I’m not being redundant. There is wanting, and then there is wanting. I can want to become a doctor, for example; but if I don’t want to become a doctor more than I want to play video games, more than I want to hang out with my friends and more than just about anything else, I will never become a doctor. There is wanting, and then there is really wanting: wanting so much that it is pretty much all I want. And so we might say that if you want to see God, you have to want to see God more than just about anything else.

Fr. Michael reflects on this quote from St. Isaac the Syrian (Homily 36), "A small affliction borne for God’s sake is better before God than a great work performed without tribulation; for affliction willingly borne brings to light the proof of love…."

Over the past several months, I have been reading up on the Lord’s Prayer. Basically what I have been doing is reading homilies written by ancient and contemporary fathers (and in a couple of cases, mothers) of the Church. In the next few podcasts, I’m going to share some of the ideas about the Lord’s Prayer that I found most useful along with the connections that I formed regarding them.

In Homily 42, St. Isaac the Syrian makes an interesting statement about spiritual guidance. He says, “Do not seek advice from a man who does not lead a life similar to your own, even if he be very wise.” St. Isaac goes on, “Confide your thoughts to a man who, though he lack learning, has experience in things, rather than to a learned philosopher who speaks on the basis of speculations, having no actual experience.” For St. Isaac, and many Orthodox spiritual writers, both ancient and modern, it is very important to seek advice from those who have actually lived and experienced the things that you are seeking advice about.

What should lay people do when they have a priest whose words or behaviour is unworthy of the grace of the priesthood? What should any person in authority do to better hear the voice of those under their care, especially when that voice is critical of them?

Concern over God’s judgement has nothing to do with striving to be better. Concern over God’s judgement is to continually strive to enter God’s rest, to humble ourselves and feel sadness over our wretchedness, and to offer that wretchedness to God as prayer. This is what concern for God’s judgement looks like according to St. Isaac the Syrian.

"As Christians we are all called to be of one mind, but that one mind is not your mind or my mind or somebody else’s—no matter how holy or important that person is or how much authority he or she has. The one mind we are called to have is Christ’s."