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Search Morrissey-solo stories

In the coming weeks, I want to blog about a typical day on board; tell little stories of routines and big stories of adventures, in pictures; introduce you to some of the characters from my journey; familiarize you with the beautiful Antigua; and talk a little about my writing work on board.

I want to start, though, with a simple series of landscape photos, just to give a sense of atmosphere. For two weeks, with the exception of one day when we docked at the research station in Ny-Ålesund, we were alone on both land and sea. At the beginning of our trip, on October 1, we had about 10 and a half hours of daylight. As the trip progressed, we began to lose daylight steeply, as much as 40 minutes per day, such that when we returned to Longyearbyen on October 15, we had about 6 and a half hours of daylight. Can you imagine such a change, over the course of two weeks?

It made for some dramatic and moody skies.

Notice, in these pictures, how often my camera would reach for the Antigua in the distance :o). While I took these pictures, I was cold, in a remote and vast place where wind and ice were the only sounds. Often I was on land, a Zodiac-ride away from the ship, for hours. The Antigua in the distance meant warmth and home.

I'll start with the map of our route around the western and northwestern coast of Spitsbergen. I won't be identifying locations in this post -- forgive me, but it would add a couple of hours to this posting, and I don't have that tonight -- but I do want you to have a general idea of where we were. Please do click on the pictures to embiggen and also see them in higher resolution/better quality. These pictures are insufficient to express the range of what we saw -- but I will fill that out more in coming posts!

Dear Susan,

You were one of the caretakers of my life. The moment you saw me, you recognized me as one of yours and brought me under your wing. What a big wing it was—you brought so many people under there. I found some of my best friends under your wing, where you were sheltering them, as you sheltered me. We were all lovers of that “impractical” thing, children's literature. Until I came to Simmons and met you, I didn't know there was a place where people like us could go.

I think—I hope—I told you, before you died, that I have the best job in the world for me. It's not possible to be happier about one's daily work than I am about mine. Do you know who held the lantern and lit my way to this work? I would not be here without you. You changed my life, enormously. Do you have any idea how many women and men are thinking about you right now and saying to themselves, “She changed my life?”

You were so unique. You were a person who could never, ever be mistaken for anyone else. If faced with a line of your clones, it would’ve take me the briefest glance into your expressive, thoughtful face, the slightest sound of your careful grasping for the right words, for me to know which one was you. I would recognize your hug, too. I would certainly recognize your skirts and your earrings. I think I would recognize your perfume. After I got married last summer, you surprised me at tea. (Thank you, Cathie, for arranging that marvelous surprise.) You and Cathie gave me a bouquet that contained a beautiful flower and a beautiful umbrella (because you knew how much I love umbrellas). I brought them home to Kevin. As I showed the umbrella to him, trying so hard to express how much it meant to me, I exclaimed, “It smells like Susan!”

Last weekend, I was in Vermont by myself when I got the news that you’d died. I spent the day sitting on the porch of the cabin, looking out over the mountains, watching for hummingbirds, and reading a mystery novel by A. A. Milne. But really, I was thinking about you. I wondered if you knew that A. A. Milne wrote mysteries. I bet you did know that. I would've liked to talk to you about it. The story I read was just exactly the smart, funny (and annoyingly man-centered) sort of mystery you would expect A. A. Milne to have written, though Pooh is better. I wanted to know what you would have thought of it. You would’ve offered some perspective it wouldn’t have occurred to me to have. I would’ve gone to my friends, the ones I found under your wing, and told them, “Listen to what Susan said about this mystery by A. A. Milne.” And they would've laughed, delighted, then said, “That's so Susan.”

While I was thinking about you, a hummingbird landed on my foot. It's less surprising than it sounds; I was wearing pink and red socks with flowers on them. I thought to myself, “I hate that I can't show this gift to Susan. It would have delighted her.” Like Edna St. Vincent Millay in her poem “Dirge Without Music” that was read at your service yesterday, I am not resigned to your death, and I do not approve. The best was lost when you died. “More precious was the light in your eyes than all the roses in the world.”

And now I'm writing this letter because you are gone, and I don't know what else to do. How else can I express what you meant to me? I'm writing it to myself, and for all the people who loved you. I think—I hope—it helps to share grief, and to hear one's own gratitude expressed. There's no tidy way to wrap things up when someone dies, so I'm not going to try. I'll just say thank you, Susan, for that place under your wing. I love you, I miss you, and I'm not resigned. I will never, ever forget you.

Susan Parker Bloom, 1938-2019

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I love cheesecake, but sometimes I can’t be bothered to make a big, honking full-sized one. I don’t know what the mental block is, but if I have the idea “Hey! I think I’ll make a cheesecake!” I immediately get really tired and want to get back in bed. I think it’s partly to do […]

The guest stars of Orphan 55 talk about starring in Doctor Who, working with team TARDIS and living a lifelong dream.

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They were cast by Ral Partha in the mid- to late 70s – one has 1976 on the bottom. They are part of a batch of 15 that I painted up as my go-to bad guys for the early days of The Fantasy Trip. I probably got them at King's Hobbies, a north Austin store that is still in business! Left to right, the first three are different poses from the same army: a bowman, an axeman, and a swordsman. There also exists a spearman – maybe he is still in the box that came back from Gen Con. Returning to the photo, we have two oddballs with the same physique as the orcs: a caveman with a spear, and a skull-head zombie with a club.

I really like these little orcs. Their flat faces give them a stoic, relentless expression that's enhanced by the spike-helm with nasal. They were slain many times during the development of Melee and Wizard, but they were always game for one more try.

They were small figures when they were made. By modern standards, they're tiny. But I still love them very much; if we ever did a minis line, I'd think seriously about giving one orc clan this sort of face and gear, as an homage to the great stuff that was coming out of Ral Partha forty years ago.

If you have some of these guys that you don't want, or if you know more about their history (like, were there more than three of the orc army poses?), please let me know at sj@sjgames.com.



– Steve Jackson

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