A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

The electronic Daily Telegraph is now behind a paywall. Paper Monitor has effected an old-school breach of that wall - buying a copy of the actual paper.

It's almost like going undercover. Reading an actual paper edition of a newspaper.

Page two has the gratifying news that Carol Vorderman's nose is better. She fell down and broke it. She did not have a nose job. That was speculation.

Page six reveals that cheats in school games are copying footballers. For clarity, in Telegraphland a common equation is footballers=bad.

But you have to wait until page 11 for the really serious news.

"Here's to you, Mrs Robinson. Why more 40-somethings are dating younger men".

That's the headline. And there's a massive picture of Helen McCrory. Massive.

The anchor on the same page is Catherine Deneuve saying flat shoes are sexier than "twisted" and impossible high heels.

Further on there's a leader. It quotes the Song of Solomon.

Oh, to wear one's erudition so lightly.

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

There's crime stories. And then there's quirky crime stories.

The Daily Telegraph headline gives you a clue that this is a nice, light story about how crime doesn't pay.

"Happiness is... a burglar wasting three days for pouch of tobacco."

The ne'er-do-well spent three nights chiselling away at the wall of Medway Motorcycles in Rochester to make a hole big enough to squeeze into. Finally he breached the 2ft-thick wall. The high performance bikes were to be his. And then he realised he'd forgotten about the alarm.

"One false move towards the bikes would have sent the alarm ringing," the paper reports. "So the thief crept up to the first floor instead, looking for items to steal."

In the end he left with just a packet of rolling tobacco worth £3.

"When I got here the next morning the place was in a right state but all I can see he has nicked is my Golden Virginia," the owner says.

The proprietor's surname is Eastwood. If only he'd caught the burglar in the act.

Imagine the scene, burglar holding the Golden Virginia, Eastwood - first name Jez but we'll gloss over that - reaching for his pretend, concealed .44 Magnum: "You've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?"

It took Paper Monitor a while to work out the happiness allusion of the headline.

A clue - it depends how many TV ads you remember from the 1980s that used Bach's Air on a G string to conjure up plumes of sensuous tobacco smoke. Answers to the usual place.

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

Hair we go again. Sorry, Paper Monitor couldn't resist.

Yes, it's another hair story, and yes, there's a picture of Jennifer Aniston.

This time, however, the Daily Mail reports that the Friends star has finally fallen out of favour. At least, her hairstyle has anyway.

It says a survey on the best onscreen hairstyles reveals her locks are no longer the most influential.

"Sorry, Jen... Anne's top of the crops," is its headline, revealing that Anne Hathaway's crowning glory has outshone the competition.

The elfin cut was first sported in the 2011 adaptation of David Nicholls's hit novel One Day. But it was her Oscar-winning turn in Les Miserables, as Fantine, which saw her cut it off for an extended period.

The actress was said to be "inconsolable" after the chop so it's quite a turnaround.

For those interested in which other celebrities made the cut, Miss Aniston's long curly style in Along Came Polly was in second place. And Audrey Hepburn's "up do" from 1963 film Charade in third.

Right now there is an epidemic of suicides and opioid overdoses, on top of the unacceptably high murder rate in the city, a letter to the editor says.

Education is the smartest investment an individual or a society can make, a letter to the editor says.

Carmel is spending too much taxpayer money building expensive roundabouts when simpler ones would be enough, a letter to the editor says.

The best way for Indiana to continue its momentum and move forward is with Holcomb's leadership, a letter to the editor says.

We need to educate ourselves and then trust the process the framers' included in the Constitution, a letter to the editor says.

The interstates were a disaster with snow more than 3 inches deep in places, a letter to the editor says.

In 2019, we connected young people to shelter, food, counseling, a non-judgmental listening ear and more, a letter to the editor says.

Our leaders need to get back to the roles they were elected to and stop playing politics, a letter to the editor says.

The governor expects teachers to wait until the 2021 budget before he does anything significant, a letter to the editor says.

Lawmakers should support SB 111 as an investment to make Indiana families stronger now and in the future, a letter to the editor says.

In our state, sex without consent is not a crime unless there is force, the threat of force or incapacitation, a letter to the editor says.

An average of 907 Hoosiers are killed by guns each year, and 85 of those are children, a letter to the editor says.

When people have no respect for lives of others, it explains why the smallest disagreement can result in violent acts, a letter to the editor says.

More than half of the politicians that we voted in were on their cell phones, a letter to the editor says.

The Legislature should declare a voting holiday to make it easier for all Hoosiers to vote on election day, a letter to the editor says.

Pence has repeatedly given the public misleading information about COVID-19, including contradictory statements about testing, a letter says.

Our state is taking the wise step of reducing unnecessary public gatherings and that includes voting.

Take this virus seriously and do your part to protect everyone in the community, a letter to the editors says.

I want to publicly thank all the other workers who continue to make life tolerable for those of us who are stuck at home, a letter to the editor says.

Now is the time to stay at home and allow us to bring much needed supplies to your front door.

Many of these hard-working people do not qualify for unemployment benefits because they are considered independent contractors, a letter says.

While acceptable as a short-term mitigation strategy, the stay-at-home restrictions cannot be the long-term solution to this crisis.

They have worked statewide seven-days per week to offer support, guidance, expertise and reassurance.

Indiana Gov. Eric Holcomb's responsibility and obligation is to the citizenry of Indiana, a letter to the editor says.

Eventual vaccine developed to fight COVID-19 should be free to everyone, a letter to the editor says.

Until we have a vaccine, the road to opening is through a health care system which can handle the infection, a letter to the editor says.

I see people praising restaurant workers, grocery clerks, and truck drivers and I think this is long overdue.

IMPD Det. Chris Edwards gives update on slain 8-year-old, who was killed while eating dinner last month.

"He was eating dinner in his own home and did absolutely nothing to bring this upon himself," IMPD Detective Chris Edwards said.

Officers found a woman wounded by gunshots about 4 p.m. in the 400 block of North Denny Street, IMPD said.

Among the unaccounted for items were seven boxes of masks, 50 tubs of sanitizing wipes, 10 containers of soap and 20 bottles of hand sanitizer.

Indiana's disparity is on par with the nation as a whole, where blacks were 3.64 times more likely than whites to be arrested, the new study found.

Investigators believe the shooting occurred early Saturday after a physical altercation occurred between two adult male neighbors.

The death of a 16-year-old girl killed by a stray bullet in Indianapolis is a dramatic example of how large gatherings are hurting the coronavirus fight and leading to increased violence in the city.

Protesters gather in Indianapolis near the scene of a fatal police shooting after a pursuit that seemingly was captured in part on Facebook Live.

These are the first confirmed coronavirus cases at the Johnson County Jail.

Police said the pregnant woman was hit on South Harding Street, near the I-465 ramp.

Indianapolis Metro police are investigating after a man was found dead with an apparent gunshot wound or wounds on the city's north east side.

Within an eight hour period, IMPD officers have been involved the fatal shooting of two suspects and the death of a pregnant pedestrian.

Dreasjon Reed, 21, was shot and killed following an Indianapolis police pursuit that was broadcast in part on Facebook Live.

Indianapolis Mayor Joe Hogsett is asking for federal law enforcement to "actively monitor" his police department's investigations into two fatal police shootings.

It was vintage Kamar Baldwin against Xavier

IndyStar's columnist and radio man Derek Schultz cover the Hoosiers, Boilermakers, Bulldogs and what disease concerns mean to fans

A member of Butler's travel party told me saying goodbye to Baldwin was one of the hardest things he has ever done. He spoke for all of Butler Nation.

People are mad, and want answers from NCAA president Mark Emmert about canceling March Madness without postponing it first. So let's ask him.

Ted Guzek, the son of 1957 Butler All-American Ted Guzek, remembers his father and explains the meaning of his Indiana Basketball Hall of Fame induction.

Eighty-five years ago Monday, Jesse Owens tied the 60-yard dash world record at the Butler Indoor Relays at Hinkle Fieldhouse.