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fun fact lifespan

Today on Toothpaste For Dinner: fun fact lifespan


This RSS feed is brought to you by Drew and Natalie's podcast Garbage Brain University. Our new series Everything Is Real explores the world of cryptids, aliens, quantum physics, the occult, and more. If you use this RSS feed, please consider supporting us by becoming a patron. Patronage includes membership to our private Discord server and other bonus material non-patrons never see!




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fame and fortune

Today on Toothpaste For Dinner: fame and fortune


This RSS feed is brought to you by Drew and Natalie's podcast Garbage Brain University. Our new series Everything Is Real explores the world of cryptids, aliens, quantum physics, the occult, and more. If you use this RSS feed, please consider supporting us by becoming a patron. Patronage includes membership to our private Discord server and other bonus material non-patrons never see!




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This weekend: I’m in Juneau!

After a very long time with no appearances, I’m pleased to say I’ll be in Juneau, Alaska this weekend with books, trinkets and sketches! The 2024 Alaska Robotics Minicon takes place on Saturday, April 27 at the APK Libraries, Archives, and Museum building. I’ll also be doing a presentation the night before, Friday 4/26, at the kickoff variety show at the Mendenhall Valley Library. The full events schedule is here!





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'My ex cheated, so I refunded a gift': Scorned ex revokes $600 gift card

Cheaters never win, as this woman found out the hard way after deceiving her boyfriend. 

Breaking up is never easy, no matter what the reason. But when one partner cheats, it can certainly make the decision easier for the other person! Instead of breaking up with someone they adore, they now can move along to someone who treats them with dignity. And they're often left wondering how they can make their ex's life just slightly less convenient than it was before. In this person's case, they managed to steal back a $600 gift card from that cheater. Too bad, too sad! And, as this person proudly proclaimed in the aftermath of their plan, "Mission accomplished." 

This person shared their own story of petty revenge on a cheating ex. Commenters loved the story, and a few even chimed in with their own excellent stories of times they got even with their exes. Keep scrolling to check out a handful of the petty revenge stories

Up next, read about these employees who were fired quickly after getting sassy with customers, like one employee who dared say, "If I have to talk to you again, you have to sit in time out for 10 minutes.




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'She has a temper [...] I hate her': 16-year-old girl refuses to tutor her terrible 15-year old sister despite parents' threats of punishment

We're often taught that we have an obligation to love our family and that "blood is thicker than water." While this is overly simplistic, I think it remains true that we should try harder to make things work with our family than we would with other random people. We should seek to resolve issues that reasonably can be resolved with a higher obligation than we would with friends and acquaintances. But even with family, there is a point where cutting ties becomes the only option.

Still, these sisters may come to find they grow closer as they grow older and as whatever chip this younger sister has on her shoulder subsides and she matures—or they may never come to find common ground, with old deep cuts festering and becoming impossible to resolve and move past. But, for now, it's hard to say that the older sister is wrong for not wanting to help her sister out. Siblings are going to fight, but there's a point where things go way too far, and the parents desperately need to intervene. Perhaps the parents would be better off just hiring a tutor to help her with the subjects she's falling behind in.




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25-year-old employee requests off to attend a funeral, micromanager demands for proof of the service: 'After this, I want to quit'

The last thing anyone wants when they are going through a family emergency is to have to deal with your micromanaging boss simultaneously. Here, we have an employee who took one day off to attend the funeral service of a family member. He did not request any bereavement leave or anything more than just the one day of paid time off he was certainly entitled to based on his contract. 

However, upon his return to the office, his micromanaging supervisor demanded for proof that he did, in fact, take time off to attend a funeral service. Apparently, this was because he also had to dip out early one day due to a dentist appointment. The supervisor's own boss was skeptical about the whole thing and forced the supervisor to request for proof. Now, all the employee wants to do is leave the company with no notice instead.

Keep scrolling below for the full story and for the best reactions from folks in the comments section. For more, check out this post about a 40-year-old company man who was passed over for a promotion in favor of a much younger coworker.




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'A masterclass in how not to get hired': 18-year-old writes unflattering pitch for themself on social media job page

This person is young and aspirational, but their methods of finding a new job could use some fine-tuning. 

Creating your very first resume is both intimidating and kind of embarrassing. Because you have zero job experience, you have to write about the clubs you participated in school, or your hobbies where you have leadership qualities, or even just the classes you're currently taking. None of that life experience is going to wow a hiring manager. But that's why kids start small, picking up jobs at fast food chains or clothing stores and working for minimum wage. 

This 18-year-old had a different idea of how they think their first jobs should go. They wrote in to a Facebook group for job offerings with an interesting paragraph about their own experience. Instead of highlighting their best attributes, they insisted on avoiding jobs where they have to work with customers (even though they claim to be outgoing in the same breath). The internet found this all very funny, and had some notes for this kid about better ways to find a job. 

Up next, have a laugh at some employees who got fired after getting petty with their most entitled customers, like one who informed a customer that, "If I have to talk to you again, you have to sit in time-out for 10 minutes."




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'[He] was on 24/7 call, so unplugging the phone wasn't an option': Tech support guy gets revenge on an angry IT customer by programming the office phone to call him at 2, 3, and 4 AM every night

We learned from a young age that you should be nice to the other kids on the playground. Share the bouncy rubber ball, don't pull a girl's pigtails, and include everyone in your fun games! That's how it should be in the working world–the adult world–because if you make an enemy on the blacktop, you might just get destroyed in the next game of dodgeball. 

This IT customer learned never to mess with their tech support crew after being a total buffoon on the phone. He was known for screaming at the guys who were just trying to help him troubleshoot his modem, but finally, after being placed with the same phone support guy one too many times, he snapped and decided to get some revenge. 

Frankly, I think this guy's sleep schedule became a little more precious to him after he got completely pwned by the dude he was used to screaming at–I guess now it looks like the phone is the only thing screaming at 2 AM… 3 AM… and 4 AM. Do you think he'll be nicer to his next customer service rep after this? You be the judge.




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'Boss claims that me quitting will result in the business closing': Worker gives 2-week-notice after basically running the company they work for for their boss, prompting boss's total meltdown

It is truly mind-boggling how some employers will treat the workers who are essential to the success and operation of their business. They gamble that they can pay them below market rates and keep them exactly where they are and that their workers will continue to be milked like the cash cow that they are… After taking on increasing responsibility in their boss's small business, this worker knew it was time to move on to greener pastures. They did what they thought was the right thing and gave their boss their two-week notice, prompting a meltdown that they could not have anticipated. 

As commenters in the original thread noted, this begs so many questions. Like, if they were so important to the business why didn't their boss recognize that and reward them for it? Surely, there were chances and opportunities for their boss to give them a promotion or even a partnership in the business that they were so essential to. Still, their boss's general laissez-faire attitude and seeming reluctance to lift a finger to support their own business has spelled their own doom. It seems that they were totally complacent and happy to let the employee do all the work while they raked in all the profits.




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Man is left jobless when scorned ex-employee refuses to hire him after receiving the same treatment 9 months prior: ‘HE is now redundant’

Nothing feels worse than being "made redundant" at your company after spending years being the best employee you could be. You did everything right! An employee that was always on time, always got tasks done in a timely manner, and never caused a ruckus in the office. Sometimes, there's no rhyme or reason to being made redundant. It's not a reflection of your work ethic, but rather, the very DNA of the corporate machine. Churn in, churn out.

When you finally go to apply for another position, you're surprised to see one of your ex-colleagues at that specific company. Hoping this would work in your favor, you complete the interview with high hopes. Instead of putting in a good word about you, your ex-colleague decides to tell the interviewer that you had "asked too many questions" at your previous workplace. Isn't curiosity what most employers want? Well, 9 months later, you see someone very familiar waiting to be interviewed at your new company. Your mouth turns upward into a small when you realize it's the same ex-colleague who refused to hire you. Sweet karma.




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18-year-old stepdaughter refuses to accept younger stepdaughter and 39-year-old stepmother, stepmother tells her to move out: 'I told her that if she hates us so much then she can leave'

At 18, you are an adult in every sense of the word. Sure, your frontal lobe hasn't fully developed, and you're going to make a whole lot of bad choices over the next seven or so years, but the difference between 17 and 18 is that you're going to be solely responsible—and accountable—for those decisions. That means the way you engage your personal relationships and the decisions you make for your future are on you, despite your relative inability to properly rationalize them and your lack of experience in making them.

If you're fortunate and privileged, you'll still have the support of parents, guardians, and other mentors who push you in the right direction. If you're even more fortunate, you get to spend these years in a structured simulation environment called "college," where you get to engage with other frontal-lobe-ly challenged "adults" where you can go on adventures and make all kinds of terrible decisions that you'll look fondly on and/or regret for the rest of your life. But regardless of whether or not you attend this life-simulator, you're going to have to start getting your act together and taking responsibility, which is why the behavior of this 18-year-old, despite her tragic background, needs to desperately be adjusted.

This stepmother has been really struggling to develop a closer relationship with her 18-year-old stepdaughter, who has not adjusted well to her blended family, saying horrible things about her stepmother, who she has known as a parental figure for most of her life. This tragically complex situation is probably a signifier of some underlying trauma that the young woman is dealing with, but it prompted the stepmother to turn to this online community to see whether or not she was in the wrong for telling her stepdaughter to leave their home, to which the young woman complied.




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Candidate gets rejected from a job they perfectly qualify for, they reapply with a new email account and immediately get moved up in the hiring process: ‘It was even the same recruiter’

Who didn't experience the frustration of getting email after email of rejection from countless jobs you thought you'd be perfect for? If you never experienced that, then congratulations! You are one in a million. If you do know what we're talking about, our question to you is – After how many rejections did you acknowledge that maybe the problem is you and something should change? 50? 100? 1000?  Plus, what does one should change to actually make a difference?

The person in this Reddit story came up with an interesting tactic after getting rejected from a job for which they were perfectly qualified. After several more similar rejections that made no sense to OP (original poster), they decided to open a new email account and reapply for jobs using the same exact resume. This tactic proved successful when they were immediately moved up to the next step in the hiring process for that initial perfect job.

Keep scrolling to read the full story. After you are done, click here for a story of an employee who overheard their boss talking about major workplace changes, and then confronted him about it.




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'I didn't even think it was possible to get fired at orientation': 20+ Employees who were stunned to be fired for their big mistakes

In case you've never considered it before, yes, you can get fired at your job orientation. It probably makes things easier for the hiring team. Why bother hiring a person who can't even make it through the first few days of the gig?

Some people get hired at a job, but they make it clear from day one that they're just utterly uninterested in doing work for even a minute. One guy chose to only work from 10 AM-12 PM each day, which is iconic of him, and I wish him all the best. Another woman became notorious for her habit of refusing to work, and only riding the office tricycle all day! It's pretty startling that some people make it so blatantly obvious how little they want to work. Have some subtlety! Just do what a lot of higher-ups do and work half a day, grab a long lunch with your coworkers, then claim you're taking a phone meeting and leave at 3 PM. How hard could it be to get away with that? Keep scrolling to read some of the funniest stories about coworkers getting fired early on. 

After that, read the tale of the babysitter who ate about $25 of a $90 cake, and the woman she babysat for (her own aunt!) wants to be repaid ASAP. 




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Woman calls out her emotionally manipulative mother for calling her ungrateful during Thanksgiving meltdown: 'Mom, you really need to stop playing the victim'

Hosting family events is no small thing. Letting people into your intimate space who you have a close and (possibly) troubled history with, resulting from problematic relationship dynamics, presents all sorts of problems. It's basically like opening a Pandora's box of sorts of complex family trauma. Usually, the problematic ones will be rogue cousins or uncles who you just don't see eye to eye with, but occasionally, it will be your own problematic parents.

This woman found herself at a breaking point with her emotionally manipulative mother, who she says has a severe victim complex. While she was hosting the family's (Canadian) Thanksgiving, her mother's passive-aggressive jousting prompted her to strike back, countering her mother's monologue about parental sacrifice with her own attacks, calling out her mother's behavior. This, of course, put a damper on festivities, with some members of the family siding with the woman and others siding with her mother.




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Mother appoints her brother to be her 3 under 10-year-old children's unpaid personal chef: '[She] expect[s] me to make something every day for the kids'

Meals are undoubtedly one of the most important daily chores, along with sleep. Being properly fed is one of the things that everything else in a successful and happy life stems from. But providing healthy meals for your family isn't cheap… Have you seen the price of groceries these days? And the time it takes to cook and clean for an entire family can't be understated. So, undoubtedly, the combination of those two things, the time and the price of the actual food, would be supremely valuable. 

Of course, you can just trick your sous-chef brother into cooking for your three children instead. Surely, if he's willing to do it once for free, you can just ask him to do it again and again. Even when it comes to family, there's a limit to the favors you're expected to perform, and there's a point where demanding favors just becomes freeloading and entitlement




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25 Job Hunting Memes for Exhausted Resume Jockeys

Having a job is a requirement in today's society. In fact, having multiple jobs is kind of a requirement these days… So many are on that job hunting grind. That LinkedIn warriors kind of life, ya know? Every day you're checking your messages and crossing your fingers for a recruiter or some company's HR to give you a chance. Why not? You have the experience! Oh, but sorry, they need 30 years of experience for an entry level job. How is a 20-something-year-old supposed to get 30 years or experience?? Also, what's with the whole "just upload your resume!" but then they literally make you still type out everything that is on your resume? That is SO annoying. And cover letters. The BANE of anybody searching for a job's existence. Like, "here's a cute little love letter as to why you should love me back." Gross. Can we please just be professional and get back to memes?? Thank you. 




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Stage mom of 16-year-old divorces husband via email, CC's his entire family and friend group: '[He's] unable to adapt to any change'

There's divorce, and then there's burning every bridge you've ever built! This stage mom of a 16-year-old is sharing her story about what happened when she and her husband decided to call it quits via email, and it is a messy story. 

I suppose every divorce is messy in its own way. Some couples face cheating allegations, with one partner losing trust in their spouse. Others realize they're just not compatible anymore, and have different life goals. And of course, it's always more complicated when family is involved, whether that's having a bunch of kids or having parents who live at home (or both). 

It's not like you can totally keep the public out of the loop when you divorce your spouse. You'll have to pack up everything you own and move, sign legal documents, and face big life changes. Still, the way this stage mom went about it had people on the r/AITAH subreddit calling her out for her behavior. Check out the full story below and see if you side with her or her husband. 

Up next, read about these employees who got fired almost as soon as they started the job, like one dude who refused to wear safety gear, telling the supervisor "no" to his face! 




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'Had to sit in different seats at the theater because this is what we found': 20+ Movie theater moments that made people want to walk out early

Going to the movie theater is all fun and games until you remember you have to deal with the general populace while there. 

For many people, having a night at the movies is the perfect way to view the newest blockbuster. There's nothing like the feeling of entering the theater and smelling that strong popcorn scent. You get your tickets and snacks, then make your way to your seat to watch a bunch of trailers. (Some people don't like watching trailers, but I think it's a good way to get your money's worth out of your excursion!) Then you settle in to watch the film on the giant screen in total darkness.

Well, that's the ideal situation. But I'm sure you know that the people below had much worse movie dates than that. For example, a shocking amount of people enjoy using multiple screens during the showing. Some pull out their phones at full brightness. Others will shell out $20 for a ticket, only to pull out their laptops and work the whole time (or at least until the manager tells them to knock it off). And that's just one of the numerous issues that these movie-goers encountered… check out a bunch more below. 

Up next, read about the single very silly reason this manager refused to hire a qualified barista, saying that "[It] is just really tacky.




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June 7, 2019




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Jun 19, 2009




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June 23, 2006




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June 10, 2004




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June 18, 2003




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Six unelected people forcing their unpopular christian nationalist agenda on a population of three hundred and forty million is not a Democracy. It is tyranny.

America has not been attacked like this since 9/11. Six unelected people forcing their christian nationalist agenda on a population of three hundred and forty million is not a Democracy. It is tyranny.




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Cartoons from the June 26, 2023, Issue


Cartoons from the June 26, 2023, Issue




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I grieve for my country

I lived for 8 years under President Ronald Reagan, a shallow, stupid, evil man who wrecked the economy and laughed as gay men, and others, died of AIDS, who made deals with our enemies to get elected, and I said, “at least it can’t get worse than this.” I lived for 8 years under President […]




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My unpleasant Christmas memory

I’m in the mood for some self-abasement, and also to nod in the general direction of the Xmas season. I’m going to tell you about the most horrible, embarrassing moment of my life so far. Maybe it’ll inspire you to mention your moment of humiliation in the comments to make me feel a little better. […]



  • Miscellaneous and Meta

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You have to admire their cunning

Every year, around this time, as the weather gets colder, we get an influx of mice moving into our house to find refuge. Our cat is useless — she makes a lot of noise, usually in the middle of the night, but she can never deliver the coup de grace. It seems I already have […]




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Chris Mason: Badenoch will need all her political savvy to transform Tory fortunes

Kemi Badenoch is a political fighter and she now has a battle on her hands to rebuild her party.




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Return of unpredictable president puts UK defence spending top of agenda

Politicians say we're living in dangerous times, and Trump is a lot less willing than Biden to pay for Europe's defence.




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Tenants may not be able to buy new council homes - Rayner

Angela Rayner told the BBC restrictions would be placed on new social homes in England.




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O'Neill 'understands' hurt over Remembrance Sunday event

Sinn Fein's Michelle O'Neill responds to criticism over her attendance at a Remembrance Sunday event.




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Macron and Starmer vow 'unwavering' Ukraine support

The leaders' discussions also focused on the Middle East and the problems caused by migration in Europe.





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Probability of operating an alarm clock Rubix cube, doable with hours of concentration Qauntum physicists have yet to unravel the mysteries

Probability of operating an alarm clock






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Why hundreds of Samsung workers are protesting in India

About 1500 workers in Tamil Nadu state have been striking work for the past 11 days.




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Why there's a rush of African satellite launches

Falling launch costs have given African nations a chance to send their own satellites into orbit.




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Tech Life: AI helps doctors detect lung cancer

AI is acting as a second pair of eyes for radiologists examining X-rays.




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Social media faces big changes under new Ofcom rules

Ofcom warns social media companies could face fines if they don’t comply with the new Online Safety Bill




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Blade Runner 2049 maker sues Musk over robotaxi images

Alcon Entertainment says it denied a request to use material from the film at the Tesla cybercab event.




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Facebook and Instagram launch celebrity scam ad crackdown

Celebrities including Elon Musk and Martin Lewis repeatedly feature in ads for products they have not endorsed.




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TikTok founder becomes China's richest man

Zhang Yiming's fortune has leapt to almost $50bn, according to a newly published rich list.




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Call of Duty: Black Ops 6 launches with eyes on Game Pass

It is available straight away to subscribers of Microsoft’s Game Pass service, a first for a game this big.




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'I can't run a business like this': Why the WordPress row matters

WordPress's tools are used by 40% of the world's websites, making this a spat with big consequences.




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'Sickening' Molly Russell chatbots found on Character.ai

The foundation set up in her memory said it would cause "further heartache to everyone who knew and loved Molly".




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Hunt for Bitcoin's elusive creator Satoshi Nakamoto hits another dead-end

Why are still no closer to unmasking the mysterious Satoshi Nakamoto?




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Australia plans social media ban for under-16s

The government says it wants to mitigate the "harm" social media is inflicting on children.