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'I spotted my daughter with a guy...'

Dear Diana,
My 21-year-old daughter had been behaving odd for the last few months. I was observing her as she would always be glued to the phone. Needless to say, I was worried for her. I am a widower and she is my only child. Whenever she would talk on the phone, she would walk away from me. She then started coming home late at night every other day. When I would ask her, she would be evasive. To my shock, last week I spotted her with a guy in a park near our house. I hated him at first sight. He looked like a nerd and someone just not suitable for my daughter. I wanted to accost her, but on second thoughts stopped myself. When she came home, I did not tell her anything. Should I tell her? I do not know how she will react? She is the apple of my eye and I do not want to hurt her.
— Vrajesh

Dear Vrajesh
You are wondering how your daughter will react when you tell her that you saw her with a guy in the park. You think it will affect her. But you are assuming too much and chances are that you are reading too much into it. If she is friendly with this guy, you need to talk to her. You need to sit down and calmly tell her that you saw her. Do not be hostile as it will then make your daughter withdraw more in her shell. The fact that she was in a park nearby to your home could be that she has nothing to hide. Sit down and have a chat. I am sure it will put you at ease as well as your concerns for her.


Diana will solve it!




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'I am scared of letting my family down...'

Dear Diana,
My SSC exams just got over and I know for a fact that I am going to fail. The feeling scares me to a point where I can’t sleep or eat. I don’t want to interact with friends or my family. I am scared of letting them down, especially my mother. My parents are pretty strict and I don’t know how they will react if I fail. I tried very hard to learn everything, but when I was about to write my exam, I realised that I couldn’t remember anything. I was completely blank. No one has failed in my family. Please help. I am scared.
— Rohan

Illustraion/ Uday Mohite

Dear Rohan
It’s natural that you are feeling scared of telling your parents that you might flunk in your exams, but instead of being anxious all day, it’s best that you sit them down and tell them exactly what your problems are. Even if they shout at you at that moment, eventually they will understand what you are going through. In fact, who knows, they might be able to help the situation. You mentioned that you tried studying but couldn’t memorise, so may be your parents could help you improvise on the way you learn. Remember, that life is a long journey and these numbers in your exams do not dictate how successful you are going to become in the future. They are mere marks. It also seems that you are scared that your relatives might not think highly of you when they get to know that you have failed but at the end of the day, you have to live your life and are the best judge of your capabilities. Believe in yourself.


Diana will solve it!




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'She led me to the bedroom...'

Dear Diana,
Last week, when I was at my friend’s home, a couple of drinks down, I got carried away. I was at his place for dinner. My pal got a call from his office for some work. One of his office staff members then dropped in with a bunch of documents. He got busy and was at his laptop. His office help and he were going through the papers. My pal’s wife and I then moved to the balcony with our drinks. Their bedroom has an entrance from the balcony. I was quite drunk, but in my senses. As it was windy on the balcony, his wife said we could sit in the bedroom. A few more drinks down and we got carried away. I kissed her, but she did not move away. Nor did she stop me. It was as if she wanted me to make the first move and get physical with me. A few minutes later, we walked back to the living room where her hubby and his office guy were still busy with work. She behaved as if nothing had happened. I, too, kept quiet. Now, I can’t get over her. I crave for her touch even though I am also married.
– Arindam


Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dear Arindam,
You are playing with fire and you know the consequences. She is your buddy’s wife so you will lose not only a dear pal, but also destroy your marital life. She may have had her reasons to let you on, but when it comes to revealing the truth, she might just put you in the dock. She will then blame you and say that you outraged her modesty. Your friend will then take her word and will not believe what you say. It is better that you get this woman out of your mind. Avoid interacting with her too much. Her hubby is your pal, not she. If she is keeping quiet about it, then let it remain between you two. At the same time, never ever again get yourself in such a situation.


Diana will solve it!




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'Our eyes met and love happened...'

Dear Diana,
A few days ago, I was at a ice lolly stall in my neighbourhood. It was late afternoon and the heat had got to me. I ordered for a lime lolly. As I waited for my order, I saw this girl at the cart. In a second, I felt attracted to her. I kept looking at her. Realising it, she felt conscious and moved away. She was with her friends and we kept looking at each other. When they left, I tailed them till they entered a housing complex in the vicinity. Ever since, I have been going to the ice lolly cart every other day hoping to see her again. This girl haunts me. How do I know who she is? I think she is the girl for me. I have been visiting the ice lolly and juice centre at different timings, but to no avail. How do I know where exactly she lives? Thanks to my frequent trips to the centre, the attendants have realised what is on my mind. One of the extra friendly guys at the cart tells me she does visit regularly, but our paths have not crossed.
— Vickrant


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Vickrant,
You may feel it is love at first sight, but you don't know who she is. Nor are you aware what is on her mind. Just because your eyes met does not mean anything. Like you, she must have been parched and looking for a quencher. By landing at the ice lolly and juice centre all the time, you sure are giving good business to them. Instead of planning a future with the girl, try to find out who she is. If you feel she is a regular at the outlet, you can find out from the attendant, who you have befriended, around what time she usually frequents the place. But do not stalk her or you will get into trouble. The next time you see her, smile and then, may be, start a conversation.





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'I got carried away...'

Dear Diana,
I had gone with my office colleagues to Khandala over the weekend. It was the 50th birthday of our boss, so he had booked a resort for the office staff. He runs a trading company and the staff strength is 14. Out of which five guys, including me, and six girls went for the celebration. After an evening of merrymaking we all headed to our rooms. As I was unable to sleep, I sat in the garden for a while. One of my female colleagues, too, stepped out as she was unable to sleep. We got talking and on the spur of the moment I kissed her. She did not stop me. As it was dark in the garden and no one was around, we got intimate and then went to our respective rooms. Back in Mumbai, I was engulfed in guilt. I am married and have a young daughter. This female colleague is single. She pretends as if nothing happened, so I also did not broach the subject again. Should I tell my wife what happened in Khandala? I do not know how she will react.
— Palash


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Palash,
You got carried away in the heat of the moment and are now regretting it. You can say it was one weak moment. Now you are regretting and thinking about your wife. But before telling your wife about your one-night stand, think how well your wife can handle the situation? If not, it is better to keep quiet, but at the same time you must not fall prey to temptation and let yourself go. Whatever happened in Khandala, is better left there. Your female colleague is also tightlipped, so it is better you keep mum. And hopefully she will remain quiet. It is better to be safe, than sorry. So next time do not fall prey to temptation.





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'I have fallen for this new girl in the neighbourhood...'

Dear Diana,
I've been in a relationship with a girl in my neighbourhood for the past few years. We hang out together and we are considered to be a couple. We have been together since our school days. Recently, I met another girl who has moved to our housing complex. I feel attracted to her even though I do not know her. She is extremely pretty. I keep fantasising about her. I do not understand why I have developed feelings for this other girl who I do not know. Some of my neighbours have befriended her and say that she is a sweet, caring girl. I want to strike a friendship with her, but at the same time do not want to hurt my girlfriend. What is worse is that we stay in the same neighbourhood so — sooner or later — my girlfriend is going to find out.
— Neeraj


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Neeraj,
You don't even know this new girl in the neighbourhood, but have fallen head over heels for her. As she is attractive, you might be infatuated by her. At the same time, you do not know if there is someone on her scene. You seem to be getting carried away by her looks. When you speak to her, you will have a different viewpoint of her. Your girlfriend will throw a fit when she finds out that you have developed feelings for someone else. Don't let this other woman ruin what you have with your girlfriend of so many years. Also, your mind is muddled. Sit down and think in what direction you are heading. First, get to know this new girl and then decide whether she is the girl of your dreams.





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'I bumped into my ex at a shopping mall...'

Dear Diana,
I was in a relationship with a girl for four years before we parted ways three years ago. Our break up was quite bitter and obviously we never tried contacting each other after that. Last week, I bumped into her at a shopping mall. I was with my girlfriend and she was with a guy too, but I don’t know if he was her boyfriend. We were in the same store and happened to cross paths. We smiled at each other, but didn’t talk. Now, just seeing her brought back so many memories. I have never had the same emotional connection I had with her and I can’t stop thinking about her. I don’t know if it’s love or just nostalgia, but I can’t get her out of my head. I have been having constant fights with my current girlfriend because she can sense that something is amiss. Please help.
— Abhinav


Illustrastion/Uday Mohite

Dear Abhinav,
Bumping into an ex can get very awkward, but the fact that you can’t stop thinking about her even after just seeing her means that you still have feelings for her. If you were in love with your current girlfriend, meeting your ex flame would have meant nothing to you. So, I feel you should first understand that yourself. Then, talk to your present girlfriend about your feelings because you do owe an explanation to her. Even if both of you decide to take a break or call it off, it will only be for the better. Now, as far as your ex-girlfriend is concerned, try and figure out if she also has feelings for you. There is no point going after her if she is not on the same page as you. Best of luck!





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'My girlfriend is greatly influenced by her sister...'

Dear Diana,
I have been with this girl for over three years now. Things are going fine, except the fact that her sister influences her a lot. She is older to my girlfriend and ever since their mother passed away when they were young, her elder sister has been a mother figure to her. I detest her sister as she keeps telling her stuff about me. According to my girlfriend, she is cautioning her, but I feel this is interference. Last week, she told her that she had seen me with a girl on the seafront. This was wrong information as I was out with some relatives who had come down from Ranchi and were keen to visit the beach. Whatever her sister tells her, she blindly believes. How do I tell her not to believe every word she tells her? My girlfriend is 24, but can't think for herself.
— Jason


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Jason,
Your girlfriend considers her elder sister as a mother figure. As her mom passed away when she was young, her sister has taken care of her. At the same time, now that she is 24, it is time she had a mind of her own. Her sister is being extra protective of her and that is understandable. If you are serious about her and are planning a future together, you need to sit down and talk to both of them. Tell them exactly how you feel. It is better to be honest and forthright. Perhaps your girl is not even realising how she is allowing herself to be influenced by her elder sister. She feels this is the done thing. At the same time, do not antagonise the sister or things might work against you and ruin your love life.





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'My pal is eyeing my girlfriend...'

Dear Diana,
My friend and I have the hots for the same girl. I did not know earlier that he was also interested in her. He would keep showering her with praises, but I used to think it was because she was my girl. My pal is now proving to be an obstacle in my love life. He has been telling common friends that he introduced me to her and that I stole her from him. This is a lie as he barely knew her when he introduced her to me. In fact, he used to tell me that she was not his type of girl. The problem is that I don't know how to tell him. The girl is aware that he likes her, but she tells me that she cares for me. I don't even like the idea of him talking to her now. At the same time, my girl refuses to stop talking to him. I have told her to stop communicating with him, but she is in no mood to listen.
— Mohit


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Mohit,
First of all your girl is loving the attention you are showering on him as well as your buddy. Why is she encouraging him if she is not interested in him? She is to blame for your state of affairs. You could not muster enough courage to tell him that you liked the girl, so he went ahead showering his affections on her. So you can't blame your buddy. If the girl is interested in you, she would not be extra friendly with this guy too. You need to talk things out with your girl and tell her how you feel. If she does not make amends, then you need to do a rethink. Your girl will then have to choose between you and your friend. If she does not, it is time to get over this girl.





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'I didn't know about the other woman in his life...'

Dear Diana,
For over two weeks, I have been nursing a broken heart. My guy had kept me in the dark about the other woman in his life. He was two-timing me and I had no clue. A friend would often see him with a girl riding pillion on his bike late nights. She would often tell me, but I paid no heed. I always felt it could be one of his female pals he was dropping home or one of his office colleagues. I did not think anything was amiss till he suddenly told me that he was moving on. I was taken aback. I did not even think for even a moment what was going on his head. We were together for two years, so it has been difficult for me. I was taken for a ride by him. He cheated on me and I believed the lies that he told me. I do not know what to do. He does not respond to my calls or messages, but I still pine for him.
— Megha


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Megha,
Why are you still pining for him when he dumped you and lied to you? This man is not worthy of your love. He kept you in the dark about the other woman in his life. He was two-timing you. It is clear that he was not interested in you from the beginning. You seem to be a stop-gap agreement and the day he was bored of you, he dumped you. Move on in life and next time be wary. Your friend would keep telling you about his waywardness, but you did not pay attention to her. If you had questioned him at that time, things could have been different. Get going in your life. Do not pine for him. Remember he dumped you, so why even care for this man?





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'I can't handle her temper tantrums...'

Dear Diana,
I have been with this girl for over a year now. She's sweet and caring. For the last three months, however, she has developed anger management issues. She throws a fit for the most smallest and silliest reasons. The other day we were walking on the road and I happened to cross the road before she could. She was annoyed and vent her fury. Earlier, I thought I would spring a surprise and landed at her place with a bunch of flowers. But I had to face the onslaught as she threw the bouquet at me for landing at her door unannounced. I do not know what to do. She suddenly flares up and I do not know how to tackle it. It is becoming a source of embarrassment for me to be seen with her in public. Should I dump her? At the same time, when she is good, she is very good. But when she is bad, she is very bad. I am in a fix.
— Suresh


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Suresh,
Have you sat down and spoken your mind out to her? If not, you should because she may be unaware of the misery she is inflicting on you. You need to clearly tell her how you are afraid to step out with her in public as you do not know how she will behave and cause a spectacle in front of everyone. Also, you state that of late she has been having anger management issues. What has caused this sudden outburst? There must be some reason or person who triggered this sudden change of behaviour. When she is in her sweet, quiet moods, tell her how she behaves. What if you behaved in such a manner? She would not take any nonsense from you. If she does not see sense, then you need to take a decision and perhaps go your way.ndle her temper tantrums...'





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'My mother found my girlfriend's clothes in my bag...'

Dear Diana,
I had lied to my mother that I was going overnight with my pals to Lonavla. The fact was that I was spending time with my girlfriend at a common pal's house whose flat is vacant. The next day while unpacking my bag, my mother found my girlfriend's T-shirt in the bag. She wondered how a female pair of clothing was among my clothes. It was a girlie T-shirt and not one of those unisex T-shirts which I could pass off as one of my friends. I then cooked up a story saying that one of my pal's girlfriends had tagged along. But she still wondered how it reached my bag. The fact was that my girlfriend was carrying a lot of stuff and while packing, it slipped in with a large bath towel. I had just stuffed my towel in the bag and did not realise that her top went in with it. I told my mom to discard it, but she has washed it and kept it in my cupboard. I am embarrassed and do not know what to say. My mother has not broached the subject again. What should I do? I feel guilty. Should I tell her the truth?
— Nayan


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Nayan,
First, learn to handle your own stuff — you are making your mom do things for you still! Instead of stuffing your bag with bundles of clothes, if you had neatly folded the clothes and kept it, this problem would not have arisen. Also, when you were back home, you dumped your bag and made your mother do the unpacking. It is time you learn to do your own stuff. You seem to have your mother doing all your work. If you had unpacked your bag and separated the clothes that needed to be washed, you would have found your girlfriend's top rolled in the towel. So you alone are to blame for the predicament that you find yourself in. If you are riddled with guilt, tell your mom the truth who by now already knows what you are trying to hide.





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'I am attracted to my buddy's wife...'

Dear Diana,
I have fallen in love with my best friend's wife. They got married recently. I was attracted to her the day I saw her, just before their wedding. I am single. When I am around with her, I try my best to contain my feelings for her, but I cannot. I keep dropping in at their home on some pretext or the other. I have never had such feelings for any other girl. My buddy is planning to go on a holiday to Goa. A lot of our common pals are also going, so he has also told me to come along. I am scared that I do not do something stupid and make things embarrassing for her. I find my feelings for her getting stronger day-by-day. I keep fantasising about her. She calls me bhaiyya which I detest. At the same time, I would never do anything that would destroy my friendship with my buddy. What do I do? Should I just break my friendship with him?
– Amar


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Amar,
You are well aware that you are playing with fire. She is your buddy's wife, so if you are thinking of a future with her, be ready to get scorched. Remember you are ruining your life, her life, as well as your buddy's life. You may be attracted to her, but you will have to contain your feelings for her. Have you ever wondered how your pal will react? How will you face your buddy when he realises what is on in your mind? A relationship with your pal's wife will only ruin your life. You seem to have let yourself go. It is easy to say that you are attracted to her, but you need to draw the line. She calls you bhaiyya, so she has no clue what is going on. It will come as a shock to her when she realises that you are lusting for her. Banish any such thoughts if you do not want to lose your friend. If you are finding it difficult, limit your interactions with his wife for a while. Also, get going with your life and find someone else.





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'My husband is so useless...'

Dear Diana,
I have been married for two years. My husband is proving to be a good-for-nothing. He joined a gym recently, but barely went for a week. He is a couch potato and does not help me with household chores. As a result, he is gaining weight and suffering from diabetes. He also switches jobs every few months due to which we are always low on funds. In the first year of marriage, he was okay, but now he has become a pain. He cribs about everything. I work as a teacher and give tuitions to supplement the income. I don’t think anyone can change him. He is simply atrocious and always finds faults in others. His family, who is based in Goa, have also given up on him. I feel like leaving him, but then at times he is loving and caring making me wonder if I am doing the right thing. I am confused and do not know what to do? Should I give him an ultimatum?
— Mohini


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Mohini,
You are living with a man who has scant respect for you. If he cared for you, he would not behave in such an atrocious manner. This man certainly needs to be shaken up. He seems to be living in his own world and feels that he can get away with everything. You need to give him an ultimatum. If he does not change — or at least show signs of changing, there is no point sticking around. He may be sweet and caring, but that is only for a while. He has made life a living hell for you. You need to walk out on him. For a while, go stay with a friend or your folks. Hopefully, common sense will prevail and he will shape up. If he does not, you are happier and better without him.





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'My girlfriend is behaving weird...'

Dear Diana,
My girlfriend has been behaving strange lately. There is a 12-year age difference between us. At times, I feel she is childish. She sometimes tells me I'm the one for her, but then she ignores me and, at times, I am like a father-figure to her. In front of my pals, she behaves like a kid and they have started making fun of me. Things were not like this earlier. I liked her as she was mature and far beyond her age of 23. I am 35 and my family is putting pressure on me to wed. But looking at her recent weird acts, I am having second thoughts about marriage. She tells me that she does not mind marrying me for now. I find it strange. Does this mean that when she finds someone else, she will dump me? Her pals tell her I am too old and that she should be with someone in her age group. Things are getting more weird as now she is telling me that we should take a break in our relationship. I don't know what she will do next. Am I better off without her?
— Neel

Dear Neel,
It could be that she doesn't like you and does not want to say it clearly. She is going on this weird trip thinking that you will go your way. You can't be in a relationship with a girl who is all muddled up. Initially, you say, things were fine despite the age difference. This means either she has been influenced by her pals or there is someone else on the scene. Taking a break means that you two might not get back together. Sit down with her and tell her honestly what you feel about the situation. If she continues with her weird act, you need to take a decision. Then you are better off without this woman who keeps changing her stance.





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'I can't get her out of my head...'

Dear Diana,
I was in a relationship with this girl over a decade ago. We went our ways, but there was no single reason what caused a rift between us. We did not know where we were heading. There was no possibility of a future together as both of us were married. So it was a case of an extramarital affair for the two of us. After about six months, she got cold feet and stopped meeting me. In a fit of anger, I told her to not talk to me. We used to work at the same place. I then decided to switch jobs. After that she did not try to get in touch with me nor did I contact her. It has been 11 years that there has been no communication between us. My problem is that I think of her every single day. There is not a day that I do not wonder what she is up to. At many times, I feel like getting in touch with her, but then refrain. I do not want to cause an upheaval in her life, but how do I get her out of my head?
— Rishabh


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Rishabh,
It has been over a decade that you two called it quits. Time is the greatest healer, but you still seem obsessed with her. The reason being that you did not seek closure. If you had, perhaps you would not pine for her still. You state that you two just drifted apart and you cannot pinpoint a reason. If only you two had sat down and ascertained the reason, things would have been clearer on your front. There is no point getting in touch with her. Refrain from trying to communicate with her even in the weakest moments. Also, most importantly, the two of you are married, so you will be causing havoc in the lives of your respective partners as well. Let her live her life while you need to move on. You are living in the past, it is time you learn to live in the present. This girl is your past, so let her remain there.





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'My guy's parents don't like me...'

Dear Diana,
I am 26 and plan to get married to this guy I have known for the last three years. His parents, however, detest me. They are aware that we intend to tie the knot, but they still feel their son will not go against their wishes. His family feels I am not suitable for him. They refuse to explain why. They feel I am not their type — whatever it means. Six months ago, we had planned on a Arya Samaj wedding, but he backed out at the last minute. I then told him we should have a court marriage. He said if he were to marry, he did not want to do anything on the sly. With every passing day, I find his behaviour changing. He is also behaving strange. I think he doesn’t love me anymore. What should I do?
— Sancheeti


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Sancheeti,
It appears that this man is not interested in marriage. If he was, he would not dilly-dally about committing to you. He might be in a relationship with you, but is he really serious about you? It seems like he does not want to infuriate his family. His backing out at the last minute is a clear sign that he will bow to his family’s wishes at the end. You will be the one nursing a broken heart as his folks will fix his marriage somewhere else. He needs to make it clear if he is willing to go against the wishes of his family. If his behaviour towards you has changed lately, it’s a clear sign that things are amiss. You can’t trust this man, so be wary and make it clear to him. He needs to tell you where you stand in his list of priorities.





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'My girlfriend does not like my sister...'

Dear Diana,
I have been with this girl for almost a year. Things are going fine between us except that she does not get along with my sister. She just did not gel with her from day one. I thought things would improve over time, but things are going downhill between them. She is my elder sister and has been a mother figure to me ever since our mother passed away when we were young. How do I make her resolve her differences with my sister? I hold my sister in high regards, so it is important that she gives us our blessings. We plan to get married next year. I have been trying to make them sit down and resolve their differences, but it is proving to be tough for me. Last week, I took them to a mall, but they ended up fighting with each other. I think it is an ego issue between them.
– Yuvi


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Yuvi,
You are caught between these two women and it is difficult to please one as then you are offending the other. You say it is an ego issue, so you need to settle their differences with great tact. Listen to what each of them has to say individually and then resolve their differences. At the same time, these two women need to realise that both of them are important to you. There is no question of offending any one of them. You three need to sit down with an open mind and deliberate on what are the issues that are causing heartburn. You say the two women just did not click from day one. In such a scenario, it is then important to live and let live. If the two are constantly going to be at loggerheads, a reconciliation will be impossible. In such a scenario, you will need to give them space while you be the common factor.


Diana will solve it!




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'My wife is overly dependant on her parents...'

Dear Diana,
My wife and I have been married for four years now. Both of us have had very different upbringings. While I have been living away from my parents for over ten years, my wife has always lived with her parents. Although she is a free-thinking and independent woman, I feel that she is overly dependent on her parents. No matter what issues she faces, her parents are the first ones to know. I do not have a problem with her discussing her issues with them, the issue I have is that she should be able to filter what she discusses with them and draw a line. Just the other day, she was telling them about a fight we had and how to resolve it. Do they need to know everything? Sometimes I feel that I am overreacting and should accept her for what she is but then again, why do her parents need to know everything that's going on in our lives? I have tried talking to her but she thinks that I am overthinking. What do I do? Please help.
– Rakesh


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Rakesh,
Your situation is slightly tricky but with a little effort you can resolve the issue. First, you need to understand that everyone shares a different kind of rapport with their parents. May be you are okay not calling yours often since you are used to that kind of set up but just like your wife there are several others for whom parents come first no matter what the situation is and they need to discuss everything with them. I suggest you sit down and talk to her about what you expect from her. Politely tell that that you don't mind her talking to her parents often but she needs to know the boundaries. Also, converse often because may be it's the lack of communication that makes her vent to her parents in the first place.





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'She regularly sent me good morning messages...'

Dear Diana,
I met this doctor when I was hospitalised. She took care of me and gave me unconditional attention during my stay there. We exchanged our numbers and she promised to keep in touch. After getting discharged from the hospital, she regularly sent me good morning messages. In fact, the first time she came home, we indulged in some physical romance. However, she doesn't communicate much and is always mum when I tell her that I want to take the relationship ahead. I don't know what to do.
– Confused patient


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Confused patient,
It's obvious there is some chemistry between the two of you. However, seeing how she keeps ignoring you advances for a relationship, it only suggests that she isn't interested in one. Don't read too much into her text messages, it could be bulk message that she sends to everyone on her list. As for getting physical with you, well may be that all she wanted from the short relationship. If you are still curious and confused about what to do, then talk and express your desire to take the relationship forward. Tell her that you are serious about her. Chances are that you will never hear from her again or she may respond to your gesture and express her true feelings. This could either be positive or negative, so don't be too heart broken if she tells you that she is just not that into you. Take it in your stride, respect her decision and move on. May be the next time you can check out the patient next to you in stead of the doctor or nurse in charge. Statutory warning: There is no medication prescribed for broken hearts, so don't dwell much on it and look for someone who feels the same way about things the way you do.





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'I don't know if she likes me...'

Dear Diana,
I recently changed jobs and on my first day in the new office, I met this wonderful woman. She proved to be of great help to me. She made me feel comfortable and we got along well. She is a workaholic and an ambitious person. We often sit in office late as she is eager to finish off the paperwork. As we are part of a legal team, there is a lot of paperwork that needs to be done. I was attracted to her the moment I saw her, but now I am in love with her. I do not know how to tell her that I care for her. I have been dropping hints, but she is not reciprocating. The other day we were in the office till 10 pm and I suggested that we catch a bite. But she said no as it would get too late. I do not know if she is playing hard to get. How do I get to know what is on her mind?
– Rehan


Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Rehan,
First, you need to find out if there is anyone on her scene. Only then can you think of planning a future with her. There may be someone special in her life, so that could be the reason, she is not reacting. Or perhaps, she is so engrossed in work that she has no time to romance. It could also be that she just refuses to react. She may have her own reasons, so meanwhile you can continue with dropping hints. You are still relatively new in the organisation, so do not mess up things. It will have an impact on your personal as well as professional life. For now, just go with the flow, and only after it is clear that there is no one on her scene, make the move. She also may not want to rush into a relationship, so is taking time. For now, be patient.





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'She told me it's over...'

Dear Diana,
I was friendly with this girl for over three years. I met her through common friends and we hit it off well. We started hanging out together and I was extremely comfortable in her company. We would talk for hours and even spoke of a future together. Things were fine till last week, when she dropped a bomb. I received a text message from her telling me that it is all over. I was shocked. I called her umpteen times, but she refused to answer the phone. I sent her hundreds of text messages, but there has been no reply. Common friends tell me that she does not want to see my face. I want to know what wrong did I do her? Why could she have not told me about it? I did not find anything amiss in recent days that could have led her to take such a drastic decision. With no answers, I am a nervous wreck. I keep reading her SMS all day. I am heartbroken and unable to recover from the shock. What do I do?
– Monty


Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dear Monty,
After being with you all this while, the girl certainly owed you an explanation. She severed ties with you via a text message. This is not done. The least she could have done is to drop hints so that you were prepared for what was coming. You say there were no tell-tale signs. It could be that you were so blinded in your love and trust for her. Or it could be that there was someone else and she hid the truth from you. She was perhaps two-timing you or this girl was plain bored of you. Whatever the cause, she needed to tell you. It will be difficult for you, but this girl does not care for you, so why grieve for the broken relationship? Let her be and time will heal your wounds. Do not keep asking your common friends to find a reason as this will cause more chaos. Next time be wary before you commit to someone.


Diana will solve it!




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'My boyfriend taunts me and says I'm fat'

I am 19 years old and have been dating someone for 2 years now. We love each other very much but there is one thing I don’t like about him, which disturbs me a lot. He thinks I am fat, which is not right. I agree I don’t have a flat tummy, which is what he wants, but I am not fat. We have heated arguments about this. He also thinks crop tops don’t suit me. I have started dieting and going to the gym, working hard on my body even though my own parents don’t think it necessary. He still taunts me when he sees a girl with a perfect body, and this hurts me a lot. He should be with me and support me, but taunts me instead. I have spoken to him, but it doesn't seem to work. Please help. I can’t take more taunts.

Your boyfriend sounds like a moron, to be honest. I understand that you love him, but I can’t figure out why his idea of what you should look like and what you should wear should be accepted as a norm by you. It’s your life, your body and your decision to wear what you feel like. If you decide to accept his bizarre demands, you are setting a precedent for what the future of your relationship will be like. It’s not okay for someone to tell you how you should look. It’s not okay for someone to comment on what you wear. The only people who do that are ministers in our country, because they don’t really know better and because most of them haven’t been to school. Your love for your boyfriend should never be more than your love for yourself. If he doesn’t get that, he’s not worth being with. The sooner you understand that, the better your life will be, and the higher your chances of finding happiness with someone who accepts you unconditionally at some point in your future.





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Clothes brand sign Kunal Kapoor as brand ambassador for 2 years

Kunal Kapoor in Indian terrain collection

Indian Terrain, India's leading menswear brand, signed up actor Kunal Kapoor for 2 years. The actor is a perfect mix of elegance and intensity, which truly resonates with the brand’s philosophy of 'Real Mature Manly'.

Kunal Kapoor is by far the most recalled Brand Ambassador for Indian Terrain. He was the brand’s first Brand Ambassador in 2006 soon after the release of one his most successful movie – Rang De Basanti. The association was quite successful and was rightfully bagged up with significant investments in the media from the brand’s side which lead to substantial improvement in the brand's awareness levels.

"He is known for his incredible talent and is celebrated by young fashion followers across India for his cool and sophisticated style. He truly is a reflection of today’s Indian Terrain man. Today, when we are both much evolved and richer in our individual experiences, we wanted to partner with Kunal Kapoor again and take the brand to the next level," says Venky Rajagopal, CMD, Indian Terrain Fashions Ltd.

"I have always loved the attitude of Indian Terrain. The brand is authentic, and they understand the culture of the everyday Indian man. The new range in store inspires passion, commitment and is very much testament to the great potential the brand has Kunal Kapoor commented.

Kunal Kapoor in Indian terrain collection

Recently, Indian Terrain partnered with Prashanth Shah, Senior Consultant Paediatric and Congenital Cardiac Surgeon, who has saved numerous lives of children with congenital heart defects, for its property “Indian Terrain Champion Sportive Series”. The series is billed as the biggest pan India cycling event for amateurs. It is also called #theheartride, where the total amount raised by registration at the events, will be matched by the brand to contribute towards surgeries. We saw Kunal Kapoor supporting the cause at the Champion Sportive Grand Delhi which happened on 3rd Sept 2017.

The total turnover of the brand is over Rs 600 crores and the distribution width expands over 250 cities in the country with 1000+ touch points. IT is also known as the No. 1 brand across Central & Lifestyle stores FY 16-17.





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Style tips: Here's how to ooze style in sweaters and jumpers this winter


Sonam Kapoor in a bulky sweater over a dainty dress by Prabal Gurung. Pic/AFP

Style book
* Don't pick a jumper that is too thick as it might make you look bulky and uncool.
* Embrace anti-fit. It goes with all body types. Too tight a sweater dress and you might look like Kim Kardashian from her non-fashionista years.
* Belt a sweater dress if you want to look sleek but skip if you are top heavy.


Pick a pleated skirt (metallic for your evening out) to pair with a long or a short jumper, at seen on Christian Dior's show

* Pair a cropped jumper with wide-legged pants that are cut above the ankle. You can even wear cropped jeans and pair them with embellished flip flops or pool slides for a relaxed day look.
* Contrast is the key — wear an oversized sweater over a pleated or a lace skirt. You can also wear it over a dainty dress.
* For your evening out, wear a metallic or sparkly sweater with a pair of strappy heels. If the temperature drops, add a pair of colourful stockings or above-the-knee preppy socks.


Take a cue from Tommy Hilfiger and wear a glittery jumper as a dress, with stockings or long socks. Pic/Getty images

* To go from baggy to sexy, add a lace peek-out bralet.
* A sweater layered over a buttoned down shirt is a classic pairing; take it to the next level by wearing it over a shirt dress instead. You can wear it with stockings or even ankle length boots. Add a sling bag or a neckpiece to make the look bohemian.
* Wear a chunky neckpiece over a solid coloured jumper and jeans for a hip day look.
Inputs by stylists Shaleena Nathani and Neha Tham





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Unisex scents by Indian perfumeries shows growing favour for gender fluid smells

Pooja Sudhir's search for a signature scent ended after graduation. She moved from deodorants to body mists and was finally looking to mature into a perfume user, when she found a scent with musky notes that she instantly liked. "The counter manager rushed to me, saying, 'But, ma'am, this is for men.' I think that's where it all started," she says about her fascination for unisex perfumes. Sudhir, an educator with DSB International School, now oscillates between the male fragrances put out by Body Shop, M&S and Titan Skinn.


Pic/Getty Images

A scent is considered unisex when it uses traditionally masculine notes like leather, smoke and wood, but is meant to be worn by both men and women. Historically, women's fragrances have carried floral or fruity notes. "I have often wondered why female perfumes are gentle and mellow, and almost always with a floral base," Sudhir, 32, says.
The gender stereotyping of scents she is alluding to could in fact, be a product of marketing and not so much about preference.


Educator Pooja Sudhir wonders why female scents are distinguished by floral notes only

The head of communications for Forest Essentials', an indigenous beauty brand with foundations in Ayurveda, says it has little to do with nature telling us what we should or shouldn't wear. "Fragrances are best chosen depending on mood, occasion, seasonality, and your personality rather than gender." Their best-selling body mists are proof. They tend to include oud, Kerala lime or vetiver. "For us, choosing the oud and green tea combination was less about gender and more about picking ingredients that are inherently Indian. That these fragrances have male and female appeal is an added advantage."


Gaurav and Jahnvi

Jahnvi Lakhota Nandan heads The Perfume Library, a four-year-old boutique label that operates from New Delhi and Paris. She speaks of the 30 gender-fluid scents that both, men and women have been seen to pick up. "For instance, the Aphtoori perfume combines notes of jasmine and cigar, and it is our fastest selling among women," she says. Nandan's friendship with designer Gaurav Gupta has propelled a collaboration that's now sealed in a bottle. Gupta launched AGAIN, his debut unisex scent last week, one with zero floral tones. "It [decision to launch a unisex scent] was a no brainer. I am gender-fluid by personality, and I don't see the world in slots. Gender divides are more to do with social conditioning."


The just-launched fragrance, AGAIN

Manan Gandhi, the head of Bombay Perfumery, a-young-but-talked-about fragrance house from the city, would agree. Musk is not only for men, he asserts. Chai Musk, one of his best performing perfumes, blends sandalwood, ginger, lemongrass and musk. Of the eight fragrances he currently offers, two are unisex. "Women are not particularly concerned about female-specific infusions. They look for natural ingredients, intensity and retention. They prefer a scent that lasts," Gandhi explains. Internationally, the unisex beauty concept raged in the 1990s when Calvin Klein launched CK One and Comme des Garçons introduced its eponymous fragrance. It was the big, disruptive idea from 27-years ago.


1020 is one of two unisex scents by Bombay Perfumery

In 2017, fashion continues to champion the genderless idea, whether in clothes or fragrance, and the user is more keen to find an intimate perfume story to participate in than be slotted in grooves. Tom Ford, Chanel, Kiehl's, L'Occitane and the homebred Kama are all part of the gender-neutral narrative in India.

Ahsan Hami doesn't quite get the debate over male and female in the world of scents. "It may be a talking point internationally, but in India, we have always patronised unisex scents. All attars are unisex, and India is one of its earliest manufacturers," he says of a tradition that dates back to the Mughal times. His store, A Hami Bros, on the chaotic Mohammad Ali Road, was established in 1939.

The shelves don't hold "for men" and "for women" labelled bottles. Vetiver, an earthy scent, is usually associated with masculine fragrances, but Hami says his experience has proven that its deep notes and instant cooling effects make it a favourite with his women customers, along with smoky oud. He says, "We don't need international trends telling us unisex perfumes are cool. We've known it for 500 years."





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Dear women! 10 innovative ways to re-use your old sari

Don't just throw away your old sari, but re-use it by turning it into a kurta or a cushion cover, say experts. Designers Kamaldeep Kaur and Rohini and Dipti Singh have listed down some innovative ways with which you can reuse the old sari.


Representational picture

1. You can make a trendy Anarkali or a kurta out of it which can be teamed with a set of palazzos.

2. If it is a georgette or a chiffon sari, it can be reinvented into a sharara and a dupatta which you can pair with a kurta.

3. If it is a silk sari, then you can make a dupatta out of it and pair it up with a plain solid colour kurta and pants. You can also make cushion covers with it.

4. If it is a Benarasi sari, then you can cut out the border through the entire length, and put it on a plain colour chiffon or georgette sari. You can make cushion covers or dupatta or cloth bags with the rest of it.

5. You can also make lehenga for girls, kurtas, bed runner with the border. Another option can be curtains.

6. Borders from old saris can be re-used on new saris.

7. You can also add a trendy twist to the old sari.

8. You can go for a sleeveless jacket instead of a blouse with the old sari.

9. Ditch the petticoat, and drape the sari over jeans.

10. You can also use two different saris, cut them into halves or use two contrasting dupattas and drape them around like a sari. Add some interesting jewellery to make them stay together.





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Here's how you can give your skin right detox post-wedding season

Wedding always brings a smile on your face and why not? After all, it also gives you a chance to shop till you drop. But have you ever realised that long hours of makeup, excessive consumption of oily food and sweets and lack of sleep can result in dull, parched skin that is easily acne prone and pigmented? So, this wedding season, be a little smart, say experts. Sangeeta Velaskar, Vice President and Head, Medical Services and R&D, Kaya Limited gives you some easy tips to put your beauty anxieties to rest:

1. Besides opting for a skin detox or a facial, it is crucial to take care of your skin as we embark on the winter season. Therefore, limit the use of makeup products as much as possible and opt for a clean, minimalistic look

2. Incorporate the basic regime of cleansing, toning and moisturizing

3. Once or twice a week, use a gentle exfoliator and massage your face in a slow, circular motion to ensure good blood circulation and remove dead skin cells

4. Moisturize your skin at all times and even when you go out, do not forget to apply sunscreen

5. If possible, incorporate a night time regimen that includes Vitamin C to renew face cells and restore skin elasticity

7. Use products that have ingredients such as marine extracts, tea tree oil and mulberry extracts. They are a rich source of proteins and a powerhouse of nutrients that reverse the effects of ageing

8. A good facial is of course, the perfect way to detox, restore and rejuvenate your skin whether you're tired, run-down, stressed or in need of a quick fix

9. It is rightly said, that you are what you eat so consume lots of fruits, nuts and sprouts in your diet. Drink enough water to keep the body hydrated and include fruits and vegetables that have high water content such as watermelons, cucumbers, strawberries and peaches. If possible, drink at least one glass of vegetable juice to increase the fiber intake

Also, Blatrix Marion, Eau Thermale Avène Sensitive Skin Expert, lists some easy detox tips to give a fresh start to your skin:

1. While cleansing should be a daily habit, you should prefer certain products when undertaking a skin detox: choose a soap-less and gentle formula.

2. Your skin needs a deep, exfoliating clean, but be very careful to be gentle! Choose a 3-in-1 mask-scrub is a clarifying clay that turns into a scrub to deeply cleanse and exfoliate the skin leaving the complexion fresh and matte.

3. Once a week indulge in a home spa ritual. Choose a quiet evening and get into the mood with nice soothing music and a cup of nettle tea. Do easy home masks with thermal spring water. It guarantees continuous and prolonged contact of water with skin, thus enabling skin to enjoy the water's soothing and anti-irritating properties more rapidly and recover instant comfort and well being.

4. Use cotton wool pads soaked with thermal spring water placed gently over the eyes to prevent dryness from allergies or use of contact lenses

5. Use SPF based products to protect your skin from external aggressions

6. Always remember that ‘Less is More'. Your skin needing a detox means you should be using as less products as possible for some time. Also prefer products with gentle and minimum number of ingredients





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Winter fashion tips: Beat the chill with embroidered capes, peplums

Winter is all about wearability and comfort, but don't make it an excuse to let go of the style quotient. Break away from conventional silhouettes and experiment with versatile trends like embroidered capes or structured peplums to beat the chill, say fashion gurus.Ace fashion designer Manish Malhotra, who has dressed up beauties likes Kajol, Karisma Kapoor, Kareena Kapoor Khan, Rani Mukerji, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan and Preity Zinta, feels one should stick to layering, but incorporate vintage hues. "Winter is all about comfort in style as we break away from conventional silhouettes and experiment with versatile trends that cater to a young global audience. As we mark the beginning of festivities in India, my latest collection spotlights layering as the key highlight of the season; I love layering as a trend and I always incorporate it even in my personal style," Malhotra told IANS.

"Crafted in vintage hues of chrome, ivory, oyster grey and rose, organza capes, trench jackets, and silken kimonos draped over tea-length dresses and layered skirts add an innovative twist to the young, glamourous women. For the modern gentleman, cowl-necked kurta-shirts with embroidered dinner jackets and velvet drapes help accentuate European accent to the classic ensemble," he added. Designer duo Ankur and Priyanka Modi, who established their brand AM:PM 15 years ago, believe in modern simplicity. "Winter is all about wearability, comfort and style and this season we break the monotony of traditional influences to introduce bold, power silhouettes as the versatile trend to adapt. Crafted in luxurious fabrics of velvet and silk, jackets, long or short, add an understated glamour to a classic silhouette," they shared a joint view with IANS.

Pointing out the trends to go for, they said: "Be it the embroidered capes or structured peplums, each garment can be effortlessly paired across any occasion and are thus, our staple must-have choice for the season." A lot of people associate winter with black and grey. But try hues like pomegranate red and aubergine, says Deepshikha Khanna, Head of Product Development (Apparel) for Sustain, Good Earth, India. "At Good Earth, our design philosophy revolves around translating simple everyday luxury for fashion lovers across the globe. With the festivities ushering in, our Sustain range highlights fusion wear as the emerging trend for the winter season," Deepshikha said. "Breezy kurtas worn with palazzos and printed scarves make an ideal choice for a casual day brunch while embroidered shararas and angrakhas crafted in deep, winter hues of pomegranate red, aubergine and charcoal is perfect for an evening outing. Indigenous fabrics of chanderi, silk, velvet and brocade flaunt versatility and comfort and can be styled effortlessly from day to night across various occasions."

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Fashion tips: Get the iridescent trend right this December

Style

<< Mantra: Always meet a trend half way.


Sonam Kapoor Pic/instagram

<< Pairing one holographic piece with another classic separate strikes the perfect balance without going overboard into categorical tacky.

<< For workwear, it's best to use this trend in accessories. A classic structured iridescent bag or clutch keeps things work-friendly yet on trend.


Wenda Nylon Rhea Kapoor, Pic/AFP

<< For a lunch date, pair a girly pleated metallic skirt with a classic white shirt and tie the shirt at the waist to give it more character.

<< For a night out, use this trend on boots. Pair a slip dress with statement metallic or crystal-studded boots.


Gucci Pic/Getty images

<< For those wary of too much metallic or just wanting to dress down, layer a metallic tank or tee with a chambray shirt and your fave pair of blue denims. Add a neaker of your choice.

- Tips from celebrity stylist
Devki Bhatt


Iridescent vs holographic




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Panty tips and tricks to avoid 'oops' moments when in public

Visible panty lines and camel toes are big fashion faux pas and can ruin even the most perfect outfit. Do not buy tight underwear, and hide bulging belly fat with high waist panties, suggest experts.

Smita Murarka, Head - Marketing and E-commerce at MAS Brands India (amanté and ULTIMO), and Neha Kant, Founder of Clovia, have listed a few ideas:

  • Aim to wear underwear that fits perfectly. A tight underwear leads to lines and discomfort whereas a loose underwear easily bunches up inside one's clothes, showing wrinkles and bumps.
  • Underwear should be selected depending on the outfit being worn. Thongs are a good option when you are wearing tight clothing, boyshorts provide full coverage, hipsters offer modest coverage at the hip area, full briefs cover your abdomen area and bikinis are an all-time favourite giving a feminine look.
  • To avoid visible panty lines, opt for seamless panties, boyshorts or thongs.
  • To hide bulging belly fat, opt for panties with a high waist or panties with broad waistband.
  • Always wear nude or skin coloured panties under white or light bottoms.
  • While wearing low waist jeans always wear a low waist or ultra low waist panty.
  • Avoid camel toes with a very simple hack using panty liners. Place two panty liners on top of each other and adjust it over your panty.
  • Fabric of the clothes plays an important role while selecting the right underwear. A smooth seamless panty is an apt choice while wearing dresses and flimsy light fabrics.
  • Stay away from thongs when you are working out and stick to cotton panties. It is important to be aware of choosing the best kind of underwear for your health as to avoid UTI, yeast infection and other such problems.

Also watch

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Best and simple go-to beauty guide for every party season

Every girl dreams of her very own moment in the spotlight, where all eyes stay on her. With the party season around the corner the pressure to look nothing but the best, is real but this season worry no more. Lakmé beauty expert Donald Simrock and TIGI Educator Audrey D'Souza share some of the simplest yet best kept party beauty secrets that will make sure, this December you are the life of the party.

1. Let your eyes do the talking:

Preparation: Start by moisturizing and nourishing your skin

Eye: Dab a subtle shade of eyeshadow from the Illuminate Royal Persia palette, and then use the Kohl to smudge the corner of the eye to give a smokey effect.

Pout that lip: Use a nice nude matte on the lip

Hair: Cleanse your hair with a volumizing shampoo and conditioner for that extra dose of moisture and protein to the hair. Add a dollop of smoothening serum for that silky-smooth finish on semi dry hair. Using a curler, take even horizontal sections of hair and wrap these sections around the tong. Once the hair is hot, remove the curler and leave it for a bit to cool. Continue this process over until you have completed the entire head then the curls lightly to get those perfect soft curls. Finish off by adding a hairspray to keep them in place.

2. The girl next door look:

Preparation: Moisturize your skin.

Eye: A winged eye is always in style.

Get Cheeky: A hint of colour from a blush never goes wrong.

Pout that lip: Use the same lip and cheek tint for this as well.

Hair: Shampoo and condition your hair with a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner, and towel dry. Use a brush to smooth strands. Gather your hair right below the crown of your head, smoothing the front and sides as you brush your hair back. Apply smoothening serum to reduce frizz and add texture. Still holding your hair with your right hand, apply a quarter-size amount of hair gel onto your fingertips, and then spread it all over your hair, starting a half of an inch back from your hairline to give it that wanted sheen. Spritz on some hairspray, which will provide an extra hold. Secure your ponytail with a bungee. After your ponytail is secure, take a section of hair from underneath it and wrap it around the bungee with bobby pins, for a chic, pulled-together look.

5. Play it simple:

Preparation: Give your skin an effortless glow by finding yourself the perfect shade.

Eye: Try the shimmer bronze from the shine line collection and get the metallic effect on the lids, don't forget the flutter secrets mascara to up the glam quotient.

Pout that lip: Try a gorgeous bold shade.

Hair: Spray some volumizing hair mousse on damp hair from root to end. This will help pump up the volume. Blast dry using a wide paddle brush. Curl your hair with a curling iron, working one-inch section. Make sure you leave about one or two inches of the ends untouched for a more natural feel. Tie your hair into buns and let them stay so for about 30 mins. Open them up and spot spray with hair spray to keep those waves in place





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Christmas 2017: The Dapper Guide for men

We know it's the ladies who are all about 'what to wear for that New Year's eve party?', but the gentlemen need to clean up too, right? If you are wondering whether to go all-out formal or casual chic, let's help you out. Here are looks - made up of smart basics and separates, as well as standout pieces - that will set you up for that once-in-a-year party.


Pic/Pradeep Dhivar

A Timeless Combination
Akshay Tejwani in HP Su Misura
Riaan says: Men love blues, no matter what anyone may say. Blue is the new black, the fashion experts will tell you. And for that very reason, we picked a classic navy suit and white shirt. You can't go wrong with these colours and a well-tailored suit will see you through a New Year's eve party quite effortlessly as it is simple yet sharp. Note, however, that the cut has to be impeccable. For this particular look, dress it down a bit and not use a tie, to keep it a bit easier. That said, I did add a pocket square to add a dash of colour and break the monotony of the suit jacket. Elegance with restraint is a good idea.


Pic/Bipin Kokate

The Edgy Look
Chirag Sachanandani in Celio
Riaan says: Possibly, one of the most indispensable pieces of the season, the bomber has been lauded as a layering essential in every man's wardrobe. People living in warmer places need not worry because these days, there are lighter variations available, even in cotton and linen. Pair the bomber over distressed jeans to give it a nice rugged flavour. Under the bomber, add a bit of a geeky detail, like a Star Wars tee. In keeping with current trends, pair the look with chic white sneakers, as opposed to boots or suede lace-ups, which are a more traditional option.


Pic/Pradeep Dhivar

Full-Out Formal
Mohit Sirothiya in Monsieur M
Riaan says: For our three-piece suit, we chose a grey and not a blue, which is common. This suit features an elegant notch lapel, with black satin piping detailing, to highlight the sharpness of the notch point. The notch point complements the jawline and neck alignment. The waistcoat has a wide neck to provide a stronger chest structure. The fitted trousers with a narrow break helps tie in the look perfectly.


Pic/Pradeep Dhivar

The Quintessential Dandy
Akshay Tejwani in HP Su Misura
Riaan says: This look is perfect for a modern guy who does not hesitate to experiment with colour, texture and patterns. It is what the Italians like to call spezzato, which literally translates to using different statement separates in one look. Mix and match starting with a blazer featuring grey checks. To complement the checked blazer, paired with a tailored black shirt and paired it with slim-fit navy chinos. Keep the other elements of the look simple in order to let the blazer stand out. While the colour palette remains simple, it certainly makes a bold statement.


Pic/Bipin Kokate

Casual Chic
Chirag Sachanandani in Celio
Riaan says: This look is perfect for a holiday party with friends. Nothing says casual elegance quite like the classic shirt and pullover combination. The idea is to let the collar peek out of the cardigan to break the monotony of colour. Pair a classic white Oxford shirt with a bright red cardigan. And since beige chinos are always stylish, add them to the look. The white and red, toned down by the beige chinos make it so effortless. Finally, to keep it cool and upbeat, opt for white sneakers over leather shoes or lace-ups. Roll up the cuff of your chinos to show off some ankle.

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India buys what is shown on celluloid: Report

India is riding the fashionable wave inspired by Bollywood as 2017 saw movie buffs buying trends inspired by their favourite stars online, says an annual fashion report by e-commerce site Flipkart. The latest findings and trends of 2017 by Flipkart Fashion saw shoppers getting their hands on trendy outfits inspired by Bollywood.

According to the findings, Alia Bhatt, Varun Dhawan starrer "Badrinath Ki Dulhania"; Aditya Roy Kapoor, Shraddha Kapoor starrer "Ok Jaanu"; Arjun Kapoor, Shraddha starrer "Half Girlfriend"; Vidya Balan starrer "Tumhari Sulu"; Salman Khan starrer "Tubelight" and Kangana Ranaut starrer "Simran" ruled the fashion sense of the millenials.

According to Flipkart fashion report, Alia Bhatt's latest hit became the fashion guide for Indian outfits in 2017. Her style statement in the movie refreshed shopper's style quotient by purchasing cold shoulder cholis, bandhani lehenga skirts and jhumkas donned by her in the movie, said a statement. Flipkart sold thousands of jhumkas and bandhani skirts within the first month of the movie's release. The first week alone saw the sales of 2,500 plus pairs.

Shraddha made a popular fashion statement of embroidered shorts and skirts in the remake of the iconic Rahman classic "Humma Humma" in "Ok Jaanu". She again made fashion trend with skater dresses, off shoulder tops and layered looks in "Half Girlfriend". From silks to Kanjeevarams to georgettes and crepes, Vidya has always shown her love for the sari. In "Tumhari Sulu", the actress created trends again with people buying saris inspired by her looks. Smaller cities like Bhopal, Chandigarh, Nagpur and Indore shopped for the Vidya Balan look.

Another fashion trend that hit the country was the Kangana-inspired red dress from the movie "Simran". Also men's fashion wasn't far behind as Salman Khan's look with the brown shoes hanging around his neck in "Tubelight" created a lot of buzz making fans wanting to get their hands on a pair at the earliest. The brown shoes topped men's footwear search across cities for two weeks on Flipkart after the movie released.

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Jewellery trends for 2018

Representational Picture

As the seasons continue to transition and people start to switch closets, women are turning to jewellery choices that are way more distinct and personal. Pearls, statement jewellery are some of the trends that will rule this year.

Jewellery designer Pallavi Foley and Sanjay Jagwani, Director, Notandas Jewellers, have listed some jewellery trends to watch out for in 2018:

* Pearls are something that never go out of style. This season opt for Baroque pearls rather than round pearls for their uniqueness in hues and shapes.

* This year, people will see a lot more of flora and fauna which will be an aesthetic combination of glamour, beauty, nature and romanticism.

* The brooch is officially back on the runways and red carpets, and the millennials love pinning bejewelled brooches to their denim jackets.

* Statement jewellery has always worked wonders. A trendy pair of oversized earrings can turn your otherwise boring outfit into an ultra-chic look.

* With the celebrity staple, the chain drop earrings was a hit at the runway and the red carpet. It is a look that flatters universally. They can be teamed up with both western and ethnic looks.

* The all-time favourite are stud earrings. Usually preferred by women who like minimalist jewellery. There are a variety of variations in sizes and precious stones like ruby and sapphire which can be worn for different occasions.

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Textile designer Vinay Narkar looks to bring back the chandrakala saree


The chandrakala saree

Every Sankranti, many married Maharashtrian women follow the tradition of meeting for the haldi kumkum ceremony, draped in black sarees. However, the black chandrakala saree that is traditionally associated with this festival is hardly worn any more. This week, Solapur-based saree and textile revivalist Vinay Narkar will bring the handwoven saree back into the spotlight with an exhibition.


The traditional motif

"Last year, I worked with the Irkal tradition of sarees, which is predominantly a north Karnataka and Maharashtrian tradition. During the process, I came across the chandrakala saree. I had heard about it since my childhood, through my grandmother and in literature. But I had never seen one; even my grandmother didn't own one. Most Maharashtrian communities follow the tradition of gifting a chandrakala saree in black or indigo blue to a bride on her first Sankranti," says Narkar. Though black is usually considered inauspicious, Narkar feels that it might have to do with the northern movement of the sun and the end of winter. He also found references of the saree in other colours.


A saree inspired by Raja Ravi Varma paintings

With the intent to revive the saree, which represents a starry night, and uses the star or moon motif, Narkar headed to Baroda to find a photo of Maharani Chimnabai Gaekwad in a chandrakala saree. He also found an MV Dhurandhar painting in Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Vastu Sangrahalaya of a woman draped in this saree. The north Karnataka districts of Gulbarga, Bidar and Bijapur also follow this tradition. "Originally, it was a nine-yard Irkal saree with star or moon butas made with khari print. It then extended to other weaving traditions such as the Paithani (with the motif being dots) and Chanderi. The motif of the moon with a flower is seen in the Benarasi tradition too. I have also used the intricate zari kasuti embroidery from Karnataka. Black Paithanis still exist, but chandrakalas were lost," rues Narkar. What sets the chandrakala saree apart from the others is that it's not a weaving tradition but an aesthetic; the saree can be woven using different techniques.


Vinay Narkar

Narkar feels that one of the reasons that led to a decline in popularity was the khari print used to make the motif. It would wear out in places and not last long. "Also, may be the style preferences changed with time. The biggest reason, which applies to most disappearing weaves of Maharashtra, is because it was one of the earliest states to be industrialised. Other regional sarees such as the Vidarbha saree, the Solapur saree, the Poona saree have all disappeared," he explains. For this collection, Narkar has worked on a cotton silk fabric to give the saree a vintage feel associated with the tradition.

'Textiles speak of history'
"Each region of India has different stories associated with its crafts. These fables are even mentioned in ancient Indian treatises. Craftsmen narrate these stories even today. Textiles also speak of recent history, as there was a distinct class segregation for weaves worn by the royals and the masses. The practice of gifting the black saree for Sankranti continues even today. My mother-in-law had gifted me a navy blue saree for Sankranti, which was the closest to black as we don't wear black in our family," says designer Shruti Sancheti who works with various weaving clusters of Maharashtra. Yellow for Saraswati pooja, and gold and red or white and red for weddings, the use of colour and motif bears specific significance. "I am a Rajput, and several people and royals from my community wear black on Diwali as it falls on amavasya," explains Sancheti.

Also check
Narkar will be displaying a set of contemporary sarees with the use of optical art. He has also recreated a Paithani from the Peshwa era, which is displayed in Raja Dinkar Kelkar Museum, Pune. The black saree uses the polka dot motif. "The gaudy Paithanis are a result of modern times. I found the dot motif in Mumbai's old markets where people sell zari from old sarees." Another story from the collection is the Raja Ravi Varma saree. "Ravi Varma was very fond of the nine-yard saree. Almost all his characters were seen wearing it. He has used the same design of the saree in different colours for his paintings - Laxmi in red, Saraswati in white, Radha in pink for romanticism, and Subhadra in blue," says Narkar.

From: January 11 to 13
At: ARTISANS', Kala Ghoda
Call: 9820145397

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Jewellery gifts suited for your friend

Representational Picture

Don't know what to buy your best friend for her birthday? Indulge in different kind of jewellery pieces like three finger rings or a delicate pendant, suggest experts.

Aakash Barmecha, Creative Director at Yoube Jewellery and Radhika Jain, designer at MiRA, have listed a few options:

* Diamond jewellery clubbed with rubies, south sea pearls, and sapphires will always be a safe bet. You could opt for three finger rings, ear cuffs, necklaces, bracelets and earrings.

* Feminine flower, heart and butterfly motifs in the form of jewellery is an option for the feminine touch.

* You can customise jewellery as per the design and requirements you think would best define your friend. Gift a personalised chain or mini bracelet with the initial of the name perhaps.

* A single thin silver chain with a small hoop of triangle, or bars, or two layer chains long short will go with any outfits.

* You could always opt for chokers which are available in different materials.

* Pearls are said to be woman's best friend. You can invest in a string of pearls, elegant drops or a bracelet.

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This story has been sourced from a third party syndicated feed, agencies. Except for the change in headline, the story has been provided "AS-IS," "AS AVAILABLE, without any verification or editing from our side. Mid-day accepts no responsibility or liability for its dependability, trustworthiness, reliability and data of the text. Mid-day management/mid-day.com reserves the sole right to alter, delete or remove (without notice) the content in its absolute discretion for any reason whatsoever

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IS the 'tiny sunglasses' trend something you'd follow?


Alexandre Vauthier Spring Summer 2018


Bella Hadid seen sporting the shades at public dos 


Actor Jennifer Aniston at an event in 1998 


Rihanna. Pics/Getty Images


Kangana Ranaut

Ginni Negi, 30 HR professional
"I am very sure they will not suit the shape of my face. I don't prefer tiny sunglasses nor do I like oversized ones. I actually find them funny. For me, the size and fit have to be just right."

Shreya Goenka, 29 brand and product consultant
"They don't serve a purpose, so why wear them? For me, sunglasses are first, a funct­ional thing, and then comes their glam quotient. If the des­ign does not protect the eyes, I will not wear them on a regu­lar basis. The tiny ones do look cool, but so do regular ones.

Pratiksha Phale, 21 student
"I will first see if they suit my face, and if they do, I will go for them. I think the '90s shades look cool. I don't mind experimenting, although usually, I don't go with very edgy frames."

Sakshi Shetty, 22 event manager
"I have seen a lot of bloggers wear these. But I wouldn't as I don't experiment much and prefer classics such as aviators. [The tinies] look cool, but Bella Hadid can pull off anything. Also, the slim frames don't protect your eyes."

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Liberal designers Masaba Gupta and Kallol Datta choose symbols of conservatism


One of the images in Masaba Gupta’s Insta-only campaign features model TJ Banu in a chiffon saree, the pallu draped around her head like a hijab

In a world divided by political agendas and religious regulation, women's clothing is defined through moral dress codes. "Do we have the freedom to wear whatever we want, when there are no dress codes for men?" asks young Mumbai designer Masaba Gupta, through her "Can't" series of T-shirts and caps launched as part of Tiger Lily, Spring/Summer 2018 line. One of the images in her Insta-only campaign is of model TJ Banu in a chiffon saree, the pallu draped around her head like a hijab (left in pic).


Kallol Datta introduced a range of hijabs, as part of his runway collection in 2015, with pattern cutting experiments of 3D inserts, embellished in tassels and foil print

In January 2016, Dolce & Gabbana released a "modest-wear" range, joining the likes of Oscar de la Renta and Tommy Hilfiger. H&M released a first advert featuring a Muslim woman in a hijab in 2015, and House of Fraser now stocks athleisure hijabs, designed for Muslim women to wear while exercising and swimming. But the rebellious interpretation of a conservative style has seen both criticism and cheer. Veteran designer James Ferreira welcomes the newfound reverence. "We've endured the West's interpretation of fashion for far too long... open any magazine, and there are tits all over," he says. Ferreira first designed and retailed a range of hijabs with badla work (intricate Indian embroidery in metal thread) as long as 30 years ago.

Kolkata-based Kallol Datta's emancipated designs occupy a middle ground between the genders. That he is inspired by the Islamic style of cloaking is a result of having spent his early years in Abu Dhabi, Dubai and Kuwait. He began designing abayas and kaftans in 2008, and called his version "sleeping bags". It's only as recently as 2015 (right in pic), when he introduced a range of hijabs with pattern cutting experiments of 3D inserts, embellished in tassels and foil print, and sold them at stores in Saudi Arabia and Kuwait.


Masaba Gupta

"It's a cool move," Ferreira says of Gupta and Datta's new designs. "Masaba and Kallol are mending broken ties between communities; it's like what the beard did post 9/11. At a time when the world began associating the beard with a political event, men from across cultures and countries embraced the beard. Solidarity is always heartening," feels Ferreira.


Kallol Datta

How do you explain using femininity as a tool of empowerment or rebellion?
Masaba Gupta: We create clothes on steroids, what we call churning out "maal". While Tiger Lily, our S/S 2018 collection, has a lot of new prints, the colour palette of knockout pinks and bottle greens stays true to my brand's aesthetic. It's an elevated, easy-to-wear collection inspired by the modern-day woman. So it's online campaigns that allow me a creative release, a platform to have an opinion. I was empowered rather than fearful when shooting the campaign. There's always the fear of being trolled on social media, but then that happens anyway.

Kallol Datta: It's not so much about being rebellious as it is about asking, how do you shroud yourself in fabric? As a designer, I pay attention to the fabric's form rather than the human form, hence layering and shaping remain at the core of my designs. It's also a familiar space [hijab] since I spent most of my early life in Abu Dhabi, Dubai and Bahrain.

Why pick a symbol of conservatism?
Masaba Gupta: The starting point of the idea was to talk about our best-seller sarees. And the saree has been constantly debated... in relation to how it should be worn by a specific type of woman to why the youth are apprehensive about embracing it. That's why the decision to showcase the saree worn by real women, as opposed to models, in the campaign shoot. Middle Eastern women think that a saree is intrinsically Indian, hence the idea of styling this drape like a hijab.

Kallol Datta: I enjoy working with native wear clothing in a template form to realise silhouettes, which keep changing as layers are added or subtracted. The chador, manteau, abaya, kaftan or hijab become great building blocks for me to work with. At the same time, clothes-making for me is rooted in anthropology.

When a politically engaging idea occurs to you, how long before you wonder if controversy will follow?
Masaba Gupta: I don't want to unnecessarily stir up a controversy, and have people protesting outside my home. My brand's business head doesn't always agree with my social media posts (laughs). But I also believe that there's a difference between being brave, creative and downright foolish. That's why I put a caption to the image: 'This is celebratory and not a gimmick. I want women to wear a saree the way they feel best, in keeping with their traditions and their comfort. Most importantly, for them to not justify, why they chose to wear it the way they do'.

Kallol Datta: It never crosses my mind. I've been mindful about not using symbols, or portraying national icons in my designs.

How does fashion become political?
Masaba Gupta: I find fashion a departure from controversy or politics. After India, my biggest business comes from Dubai and Kuwait. My job as a designer is done when my clothes inspire freedom in Muslim women to adopt fashion the way they desire.

Kallol Datta: When Eastern concepts move to the West, they often get lost in translation. A woman wearing a hijab, a man in a kaftan - they become visible markers of their communities. The lack of representation [of these markers] in editorials and fashion journalism means that you're telling them, 'we choose not to see you'. Although Indian designers cater to Islamic countries, it's rare to see indigenous cultural markers in their clothes. Indian designers haven't moved beyond lehengas and sarees; it's their bread and butter. They are ignoring a thriving demographic. It's heartening to see 'modest fashion' come into its own.

Also Read: Jacqueline Fernandez Had Fun Designing For MMA Fighters

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From florals to fringes: Welcome summer with these latest fashion trends

Now that we are done packing our winter stuff, it¿s time to gear up and welcome the new season with some latest fashion trends.

The 2018 spring summer fashion trends are a fab mix of pastels, florals, sequins, fringes, ruffles, checks and definitely fun and bold colours.

Prep your wardrobe as Monica Oswal, Executive Director, Monte Carlo suggests you to stock up your closet with apparels in advance and unleash your up-to-date look this spring summer.

Sequins
Sequins and sparkles will be a hit this spring and summer. In fashion industry, glitter always prevails. Pair up a sequins top with pair of legging for a day glam disco look or a A-line skirt to have an alluring boho outfit. Choose from shades of gold, silver to pair up with darker tones likes blue and black or experiment with bold colours such as red, orange and magenta and pair them up with a light shade scarf or a jacket.

Pastels
Pastels will be the best pick for spring wardrobe. Add on the pale hues from yellow, purple, green, pink and orange. The shades are delicate yet they can give a strong look. These ice-cream shades go great in the sunny days, as they have cool undertones. Play around with pastel colour palette to have the quirky yet serene look.

Vintage Florals
Florals have been on top of the charts for years, but this 2018 spring summer collection brings in the vintage florals. It is a trend that was once worn in 40s and 50s and it¿s back this season. Wear a maxi or a midi dress or pair up a midi skirt in this vintage print with a solid blouse for a great surefire seller look, or pair up a floral top with a denim jacket and spread some spring vibes. One can also carry accessories in the floral prints such as scarf, mobile covers, bags or shoes.

Heritage Checks
These summer plaids are best for the formal wear. Wear a floaty feminine business suit in the heritage check pattern. It¿s comfortable yet a subtle option for an official meeting. Pair up a linen shirt with a plaid pencil skirt or trouser. Check shirts can also be opted for daily wear options and can be paired up with a scarf to pep up the look.

Fringing
Fringes are back this season, but with a sophisticated touch. Last season fringes were bold and festive. This summer fringes have an empowered appeal to it. Fringe skirts and dresses are perfect for an evening or a cocktail. Style them up with a stiletto or ankle tie-up wedges or add a hint of accessory, such as cocktail ring or an elegant pair of earrings.

Bold Colours
This summer is all about going bold with the bright and vibrant shades. From primary shades to neon accents, this season has spring bold hues. Experiment with bright pinks, yellows, reds, blues and more, wear them with monochrome blocks or tone them down with neutral shades.

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