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I have just released GNU Gatekeeper version 5.3.

You can download it from https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

This release has a number of new features as well as some important bug
fixes.

Whats new ?

• LRQ loop detection to optimize calls flows between multiple neighbor gatekeepers This new feature has the potential to significantly reduce the load on all gatekeepers and prevent "LRQ storms".
• new routing policy to set call destinations by querying HTTP or REST servers, see [Routing::Http]
• much improved support for SNMP
• important bug fix for TLS encryption of signaling channels
• important bug fixes for H.460.18 NAT traversal (for H.245 tunneling and for multi-homed servers)
• performance optimization: this version can handle 5-10% more proxied  calls on the same hardware
• performance optimization: re-authenticate lightweight, additive registrations only when new aliases differ. This significantly reduces the load on password databases.

Enjoy!


Full change log:

- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) don't send H.245 address to tunneling
  H.460.18 endpoint, breaks call when H.245 multiplexing
- performance optimization: 5% faster UDP handling
- changed default: [SNMP] Implementation=PTlib
- remove unfinished Windows-SNMP implementation, use PTLib-SNMP on Windows
- support SET and GET-NEXT in PTLib-SNMP
- support SNMP sysUpTime when running as standalone agent
- BUGFIX(configure.in) LARGE_FDSET defaults to off
- new SNMP OID 1.3.6.1.4.1.27938.11.1.9 to query total bandwidth allocated to ongoing calls
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) fix hangup when making many TLS calls quickly one after another
- BUGFIX(RasSrv.cxx) don't require H.460.22 parameters in ARQs
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) fix TLS without LARGE_FDSET
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) don't send H.460.22 priority field in SCI
- BUGFIX(gkauth.cxx) free memory from cached and expired passwords
- re-authenticate lightweight, additive registrations only when new aliases differ
- remove switch [Proxy]DisableRTPQueueing, always disabled now
- new routing policy: http with config section [Routing::Http]
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) fix H.460.18 on multi-homed servers (SCI comes from the correct IP now)
- new switch to disable SNMP traps [SNMP] EnableTraps=0
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) don't throw SNMP trap on H.245 connection errors
  (causes crash under load with Net-SNMP)
- BUGFIX(snmp.cxx) shutdown GnuGk when SNMP agent can't be started
- BUGFIX(snmp.cxx) protect NetSNMP library calls with mutex
- changed default: ForwardResponse now defaults to 1 in [RasSrv::LRQFeatures] and [Neighbor::...]
- new feature: loop detection for LRQs [RasSrv::LRQFeatures] LoopDetection=1
- BUGFIX(Neighbor.cxx) some settings in [RasSrv::LRQFeatures] were ignored if not set in [Neighbor::...]

I am happy to announce the release of GNU Gatekeeper 5.4.

You can download it from https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

New features:

• new accounting module to send accounting data to an MQTT server
• support for redis as database (eg. as backend for password storage)

Bug fixes:

• important fix for H.245 tunneling translation with H.460.18 endpoints
• fix for snmpwalk in PTLib-SNMP implementation
• fix sending alternate gatekeeper list to endpoints with assigned gatekeeper
• improved DRQ from child gatekeepers
• fix TLS with neighbor gatekeeper

Please also note that a bug has been found in PTLib that can cause a crash in any GnuGk version if you use the status port (manually of from an application). Please upgrade to PTLib 2.10.9.3!

I am happy to announce the release of GNU Gatekeeper 5.5.

This release has new features and bug fixes when you run clustered gatekeepers. It also improves the port detection feature and we have a complete and up to date Chinese documentation.

You can download it from https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

New features:

• new feature GnuGkAssignedGatekeeper to push endpoints back to their intended home gatekeepers in the cluster, even if the endpoints don't support assigned gatekeepers
• support new PBKDF2 password hashes for ssh logins to the status port
• new switches to fine tune port detection for H.239 channels (IgnoreSignaledPublicH239IPsFrom=x and IgnoreSignaledAllH239IPs=1)
• new Chinese manual

Bug fixes:

• select correct source IP for neighbor pings
• set altGKisPermanent=true when redirecting endpoints
• fix RRJ to include alternates when RedirectGK=Endpoints limit is reached
• fix reading of AllowSignaledIPs= switch
• don't complain about [Neighbor::xxx] SendAliases switch when using--strict

Enjoy!

Today GNU Gatekeeper version 5.6 has  been released.

Download: https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

It contains an important bug fix to H.460.19 multiplexing and H.460.26 (media over TCP) when using GnuGk's internal call forwarding (ForwadOnFacility).

I have also added an interop tweak to be able to call video services that don't understand H.323 URL aliases (eg. videobutler.nl). You can enable it with

Most H.323 vendors did not implement encrypting the signaling connection with TLS. They only encrypt the media (RTP). But you can use the two GNU Gatekeepers to encrypt you call signaling even when your endpoints don't support this natively.

Suppose you have 2 locations and want to connect them securely over the public internet.

GnuGk can encrypt call signalling between those locations using TLS and encrypt the media (RTP) using H.235.6 (AES encryption). 

 Configuration for GNU Gatekeeper 1 (prefix 01)

 

[Gatekeeper::Main]

[RoutedMode]
GKRouted=1
H245Routed=1
CallSignalPort=1720
AcceptUnregisteredCalls=1
; make sure H.245 gets tunneled for TLS
H245TunnelingTranslation=1
; add AES media encryption if the endpoint doesn't encrypt itself
EnableH235HalfCallMedia=1
; only allow encrypted calls
RequireH235HalfCallMedia=1
; change the media key after 2^31 operations
EnableH235HalfCallMediaKeyUpdates=1

[Proxy]
Enable=1

[ModeSelection]
0.0.0.0/0=PROXY
; only use routed mode for local calls
192.168.0.0/18=H245ROUTED

[TLS]
EnableTLS=1
PrivateKey=/path/to/server.pem
Certificates=/path/to/server.pem
CAFile=/path/to/rootcert.pem
Passphrase=MySecret
CheckCertificateIP=1

[Gatekeeper::Auth]
FileIPAuth=required;Setup

[FileIPAuth]
; allow all calls from local network
192.168.1.0/24=allow
; only allow TLS encrypted and authenticated calls from elsewhere
any=onlyTLS

[RasSrv::PermanentEndpoints]
; the GnuGk in the other location, serving prefix 02
1.2.3.4:1300=remote-gw;02

[EP::remote-gw]
; use TLS to call remote GnuGk
UseTLS=1 

Configuration for GNU Gatekeeper 2 (prefix 02)

[Gatekeeper::Main]

[RoutedMode]
GKRouted=1
H245Routed=1
CallSignalPort=1720
AcceptUnregisteredCalls=1
; make sure H.245 gets tunneled for TLS
H245TunnelingTranslation=1
; add AES media encryption if the endpoint doesn't encrypt itself
EnableH235HalfCallMedia=1
; only allow encrypted calls
RequireH235HalfCallMedia=1
; change the media key after 2^31 operations
EnableH235HalfCallMediaKeyUpdates=1

[Proxy]
Enable=1

[ModeSelection]
0.0.0.0/0=PROXY
; only use routed mode for local calls
192.168.0.0/18=H245ROUTED

[TLS]
EnableTLS=1
PrivateKey=/path/to/server.pem
Certificates=/path/to/server.pem
CAFile=/path/to/rootcert.pem
Passphrase=MySecret
CheckCertificateIP=1

[Gatekeeper::Auth]
FileIPAuth=required;Setup

[FileIPAuth]
; allow all calls from local network
192.168.1.0/24=allow
; only allow TLS encrypted and authenticated calls from elsewhere
any=onlyTLS

[RasSrv::PermanentEndpoints]
; the GnuGk in the other location, serving prefix 01
1.2.3.5:1300=remote-gw;01

[EP::remote-gw]
; use TLS to call remote GnuGk
UseTLS=1 

Other options

You could also configure the remote GNU Gatekeeper as a neighbor, but beware that the RAS traffic between neighbors will show meta data (whois is caling who) in clear text! 

See the GnuGk manual section on TLS for more details and examples how to generate the OpenSSL certificates. 

 

Many networks are migrating from IPv4 to IPv6. What can you do if still have H.323 endpoints that only support IPv4 ?

The GNU Gatekeeper can translate IPv4 into IPv6 calls and vice versa.
You can use one GnuGk to IPv6 enable all of your existing IPv4 endpoints.

 

 

All you have to do is enable IPv6 in your configuration and GnuGk will automatically
detect the connection type of your endpoints and convert the call.

All it takes is one switch in your config:

[Gatekeeper::Main]
EnableIPv6=1 

GNU Gatekeeper version 5.7 has some important bug fixes, improves interoperability
with other vendors and also has a few new features.
 

Several severe crashes and a few memory leaks have been fixed.

Improved interoperability with:

• Lifesize endpoints
• Poly's Microsoft Teams gateway
• Polycom RealPresence Capture Server

New features:

• You get a warning in the GUI / on the status port if one of your endpoints has an incorrect time setting and this password authentication fails. This makes trouble shooting a lot easier.
• Invalid TPKT packets (eg. due to network errors) now don't necessarily take down an otherwise healthy call. Use the new  AbortOnInvalidTPKT=0 switch to enable.
• GnuGk will now also return unused memory back to the OS periodically to make it available again to other applications on the same server.
  
• You have a new %{Vendor} variable for SqlAuth RegQuerys and LuaAuth

Full change log:

- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) fix crash on non-standard H.245 Indication from
  Polycom RealPresence Capture Server
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) fix possible crashes on non-standard generic information in OLCs
- print warning message on status port when passwords get rejected due to wrong time
- BUGFIX(httpacct.cxx) fix memory leak
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) fix possible crash
- BUGFIX(gk.cxx) avoid crash when terminating in the middle of program startup,
  set non-zero exit code so restarter notices error
- return unused memory back to OS periodically
- new switch: [RoutedMode] AbortOnInvalidTPKT=0 for more graceful handling of network errors
- BUGFIX(gk.cxx) fix for running on Alpine Linux (needs updated PTLib, too)
- don't start GnuGk if RTP multiplexing is configured, but we can't start the listener
- new switch: [RoutedMode] MatchH239SessionsByType=0 to fix presentations with
  LifeSize endpoints over Poly's Microsoft Teams gateway
- BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) make sure we don't set RTP address on multiplexed RTCP keepalive
- BUGFIX(RasSrv.cxx) look at all tokens for H.235.TSSM
- add %{Vendor} variable for SqlAuth RegQuery and LuaAuth

GNU Gatekeeper version 5.8 has been released with a number of bug fixes and a few new features.

To stay updated on new releases, please also follow us on Twitter!

Improved interoperability with:

• EdgeProtect
• Avaya
  

 New features:

• experimental support for Avaya's non-standard version of H.323 (./configure --enable-avaya) (thanks Konstantin Prokazov)
• consider RFC 6598 shared network space (100.64.0.0/10) and Zeroconf (169.254.0.0/16) as private IPs
  
• new switch [Proxy] AllowSignaledIPsFrom= to skip auto-detect for messages received directly from certain IPs when IgnoreSignaledIPs=1
• new switch [Proxy] AllowAnyRTPSourcePortForH239From= to handle incorrect RTCP addresses in H.239 OLC (EdgeProtect interop)
• new switch [RoutedMode] MatchH239SessionsByIDOnly= to never attempt to match a H.239 reverse channel by type for improved interoperability with EdgeProtect
• new switches to set the HTTP Content-Type header in HttpAcct, HttpPasswordAuth and Routing::Http
• new switch [Routing::Http] JSONResponse=1 to send more flexible routing data in the HTML reponses
• many new status port shortcuts (see manual section for details)

Bug fixes:

• fix H.460.18/.19 on multi-homed servers
• fix race condition when handling H.460.19 multiplex IDs
• fix media loop on half port-detected channel when media is very early
• fix Net-SNMP query for total bandwidth
• save RTCP address from OLC for port-detection
• always check AllowSignaledIPs= before applying IgnoreSignaledAllH239IPs or IgnoreSignaledPrivateH239IPs
• handle extensions and CSRC in RTP header with H.235 half-call media
• better endpointIDs on Windows when compiling without OpenSSL

GNU Gatekeeper version 5.9 is out with a number of bug fixes and a few new features.

Download: https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

New features:

• new switches [Proxy] CachePortDetection=1 and CachePortDetectionDuration= to cache port detection packets for faster media connects when IgnoreSignaledIPs= is active
  
• new switch: [EP::] ForceTerminalType=
• new place holder for port notifications: %t for port type
• experimental: better error recovery if multiplexed RTP sending fails

Please note that Radius support is disabled by default now. You can enable it with the --enable-radius switch when running configure.

Bug fixes:

• fix bug in port detection with AllowSignaledIPsFrom=
• when DNS name resolves to IP without alias, remove alias from ACF completely (Cisco interop)
• remove RTP session 0 from internal tables once H.245 master has assigned a session ID
• fix compilation of Avaya support
• initialized cmsg struct to zero before using
• fix regression introduced with MatchH239SessionsByIDOnly= switch

 

GNU Gatekeeper version 5.10 has been released.

Download: https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

This is a bug fix release.

Bugs fixed:

• fix a crash when handling the MasterSlaveDetermination message
  
• fix the documentation of [RasSrv::LRQFeatures] NeighborTimeout and consistently treat the value as 10th of a second in the program
  

GNU Gatekeeper version 5.11 has been released.

Download: https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

This is a bug fix release with a few new features added.

An important bug in the handling of the ExternalIP switch has been fixed.

We also added a few features that make it easier to use GnuGk with Graphana and InfluxDB monitoring.

Changes and additions:

• remove non-working command line switch -e / --externalip, use config file to set ExternalIP
• new accounting variables %{registrations}, %{calls}, %{total-calls}, %{successful-calls}, %{allocated-bandwidth}
• new switch [HttpAcct] Authorization= to send authorization headers to support InfluxDB
• replace and in HttpAcct body with carriage return and line feed characters
• new switch: [RasSrv::LRQFeatures] PreserveDestination=1 (helpful when calling Pexip servers)

 GNU Gatekeeper version 5.12 has been released.

Download: https://www.gnugk.org/h323downldad.html

This is a bug fix release with a few new features added.

Another important bug in the handling of the ExternalIP switch has been fixed as well as Y2K38 issues.

This release also adds features:

• support for Oracle databases
• easier cloud deployment with IP detection with STUN
• better load scaling by mixing proxied with direct mode endpoints in a single gatekeeper
• Windows 64bit executables with VS2022

Full list of changes:

• enable more runtime hardening flags from OpenSSF recommendation 11/2023
• fix bug with H.245 address when using ExternalIP= switch without H.460.18/.19
• auto-detect public IP with ExternalIP=STUN and STUNServer=stun.example.com
• compiler support for VS2022
• new database driver for Oracle and new timestamp format 'Oracle'
• new switch [EP::xxx] ForceDirectMode=1 to handle all calls from this endpoint in direct mode
• BUGFIX(RasSrv.cxx, gkauth.cxx) make sure time_t is handled unsigned to avoid Y2K38 issue
• BUGFIX(ProxyChannel.cxx) check for too small packets when acting as encryption proxy

 

GNU Gatekeeper version 5.13 has been released.

Download: https://www.gnugk.org/h323download.html

This is a bug fix release with a no new features added. It fixes an issue with the RTP port detection and 2 other minor issues.

Before Installation Installing Kubuntu / Ubuntu on the Alienware 17 R5 Laptop NVME Drive To get the NVME drive or M.2 drive to show up as an installation candidate for the installer, you need to make a small BIOS change and modify two kernel arguments at boot time. First, boot into the BIOS on the […]

The post Installation Notes for Kubuntu 18.10 on the Alienware 17 R5 Laptop first appeared on robotthoughts.

I usually prefer running platformio from command line so I can stream the build process into my backup and recovery processes. With versioning, I can roll back to a know good working build. I am most often building Marlin firmware for my 3D print farm so there is a small example of the build commands […]

The post Build PlatformIO on Windows Subsystem for Linux (Ubuntu) first appeared on robotthoughts.

I’m starting to get a little bored of telling the story every time I pick up the phone or run into somebody, so I’ll just post it here, and then we can all move along from it.

Headline synopsis: I had a tooth abscess, it was really bad, I got hospitalised, and because I suffer from sleep apnea ended up on a high-dependency unit for a night (because sleep apnea and general anaesthetics don’t mix).

Longer version:

About six weeks ago I got a chest infection. Pretty nasty stuff, and I was coughing quite badly a lot of the time. I took a day off work at one point - which I rarely do for illness - so, you know, horrible.

As that was clearing, I started to develop toothache. I’ll be frank: I hate dentists, and have pretty much avoided them for my entire adult life. The pain was coming from near my wisdom teeth on the right side of my face, which have played up now and again a few times. I self-medicated with paracetamol and ibuprofen after a couple of days. I was unable to eat solids from around the 8th May.

I then travelled to London for business and stayed overnight. At my boss’ wife’s birthday party, I discovered that my jaw was so sore and unable to move, I could barely eat non-solids, and was struggling to swallow even fluids.

Buoyed by medication, the next morning (11th May), I was able to take on about 2 litres of water and a small amount of food, but I was quickly realising I was in pain that needed professional help. Leaving London early that day, I recognised that the following day I would need to seek emergency treatment.

Manchester has the University Dental Hospital. It’s often a struggle to get seen there, but casualties can walk up for 8.30am and get seen - for free - by a student dentist, supervised by some of the best qualified dentists in the country. I made my way out on the Thursday morning expecting to be seen, prescribed some antibiotics and to make my way home.

They took a look, X-Rayed my jaw to be sure, took another look, and referred me to Accident & Emergency. The abscess was large enough that they had become concerned I was going to be unable to breath within the next 24 hours.

The SHO from Oral and Maxillofacial Surgery (“Max Fax” as it’s known), had been told to expect me in A&E within the hour. Off I trudged.

On being booked in at A&E, they took my blood pressure and pulse. They were off the charts. They took my temperature, and it was high. My body was fighting a raging infection, and losing. I was hooked up to an ECG, and they took some bloods. My glucose was off the charts - I hadn’t eaten properly in days, and my body was starting to pull down the fat reserves (of which I have ample supply) and eat itself.

The clincher though was the fact I was no longer able to really comfortably swallow without pain and discomfort. Not even fluids. Barely my own saliva. I was admitted, cannulated (a drip line being put into my hand), and put on saline within about 30 minutes.

Rebecca duly packed a bag of things for me, and being the angel she is, cancelled work and made her way to be my bedside, if for nothing else than to give me a bit of love, support and sympathy.

Things then got weird. They put some antibiotics on my IV, and there was a thought that maybe - strong as they were - I would be able to avoid emergency surgery. However, to give them a hand, the registrar and the SHO wanted to know more about what was in that abscess. They pondered a CT scan. They then realised that my mouth would open just enough to get a syringe in there… they asked to “drain it a bit”.

The local anaesthetic sprayed into the mouth to “aspirate” an oral abscess is meant to taste like bananas. If your banana crop grows in a bath of dilute acid, maybe you would recognise the taste, but it was pretty horrid. My mouth numbed a bit, and then I grabbed onto my chair whilst they did what they had to do - twice - and removed a sizeable amount of horrid stuff.

I won’t lie, if you ever need this doing, you need to prepare yourself. You need to breathe through the nose, and know that it will be over in 30 seconds. It is not at all comfortable. But you’ll live, and you’ll feel better within minutes.

Within 4 minutes, I could move my jaw more, and suffered less pain. I could swallow again. Alas, because they might want to do surgery in the morning, I was kept on “Nil By Mouth” (NBM), for the evening.

I was now on a regular rotation of saline to hydrate me, paracetamol on IV to take the pain away, and extraordinarily strong (and expensive) antibiotics to help fight the infection. My temperature remained high, my pulse remained high, and my blood pressure was high. I think at this point I was around 38-39C, 120bpm (resting), and blood pressure of about 170/100. Despite not having eaten in several days, my glucose levels were high and on one chart I saw the phrase “needs fasting”.

I awoke the next morning to some confusion. Some doctors thought I would go to surgery. Others thought the antibiotics hadn’t had a chance yet. I just wanted it all to be over.

The consultant anaesthetist at this point called around to have a chat. He asked me the usual questions about allergies etc, and all was fine. He asked me whether I had any questions. “What are the risks of general anaesthetic given my size and that I have sleep apnea?”. He froze. “You didn’t mention sleep apnea”. It was important.

To be honest, I have never been diagnosed with sleep apnea. Rebecca noticed it some months ago, when she was awake and I was very much asleep. I would stop breathing for 10, 20, maybe 30 seconds. I would then suddenly start breathing oddly. I phoned Rebecca and asked her to describe this to the consultant and for him to decide if this was important.

He decided it was very important. I was told that the night after my surgery, I would need to be closely monitored, and that meant I would need a bed on the High-Dependency Unit (HDU), which is a sister unit to Intensive Care. This was starting to get a bit scary.

For various reasons, over the rest of the Friday I deteriorated. My canular became very painful in use, suggesting it needed to come out and a new one put in. Because I have “collapsing veins”, this caused some problems. It meant I was effectively off all medication, painkillers and saline for several hours, and I got to the point I could barely talk.

At 5pm, I was taken off NBM and told I could eat/drink what I could manage until midnight. I ordered a meal, and struggled to down a jug of water. 45 minutes later, I was called for surgery - surgery I clearly couldn’t have, given I’d just drank so much water. The meal arrived, and I couldn’t eat it. I was now very low. I had missed the chance of getting to leave on the Saturday, and I felt awful.

The SHO who admitted me was back on shift, and did an amazing job of making sure I was looked after. He attempted to recannulate me himself (and failed), and then tracked down an amazing nurse who “felt” her way around my veins and gave me the most comfortable canular (albeit at a strange angle), I’d had all weekend.

At around midnight I was moved from Ward 1 (full of people with broken arms, legs and skulls and the like), to Ward 55 (in the eye hospital), where I had a private room. It was in here that a nurse - whilst moving me over to another batch of antibiotics as I slept -noticed that I had stopped breathing for a little while and woke myself up. She had witnessed the sleep apnea. By that point I was already booked for HDU after the operation, but good job she saw it either way.

Saturday morning I felt good. I had slept for 4 hours (the most I had managed in over a week), and it was FA Cup Final day.

I then received a visit from an Ear, Nose & Throat specialist. There was concern the chest infection I had prior to the toothache had triggered tonsillitis and that I had a quinsy that would need treatment - that this wasn’t dental at all.

This was the only point I refused treatment. She wanted to aspirate the abscess again. I refused consent on a couple of grounds:

1. Whilst using the tongue depressor to look in my mouth, when I gagged slightly (I have a terrible gag reflex), she thought I was being childish. What she thought I’d do when draining an abscess, I don’t know
2. She said it would be like my previous aspiration “but further back, near the tonsils”, which frankly scared the crap out of me
3. I was going to be in surgery in less than 3 hours. There was no clinical need for me to have this aspiration right there and then. If my surgery had been cancelled, it would make sense, but right now? No.

She was annoyed. She wanted to aspirate (I suspect she wanted to do it for clinical experience reasons as much as anything else), and I didn’t want her to. She went away and spoke to some other doctors on the phone, including the Max Fax team, and they - apparently - sided with me. It was an unpleasant, traumatic and painful procedure that was not needed right now. Phew.

Another anaesthetist turned up, and talked me through what he was going to do when I got to surgery. They wanted to shove a camera through my nose and down my throat. Normally they would have done this whilst I was asleep, but on this occasion they needed to do it whilst I was conscious. I still don’t know why. He remarked it would be “uncomfortable, but not painful”. Hmmm.

As 3pm approached, I settled down to watch the FA Cup Final - the first one my team Manchester City had reached in my entire life. I knew I would probably not see the whole game.

Sure enough, 30 minutes in, the phone call came. Time to get into the gown.

It’s odd when you’ve been sat waiting for days for surgery, and finally its time. I can’t deny that given the procedure to knock me out was going to involve pipes through my nose and throat, and I was going to end up on HDU, and one doctor had already suggested my chances of dying whilst under were “only about 1%”, fear was starting to take hold.

Rebecca didn’t know where she was meant to be going, and so the stress of making sure she was going to be OK built slightly. The move into surgery was not how it should have gone.

In the anaesthetics room, things generally went to plan. More of the banana-tasting anaesthetic to numb the naval cavity and throat. I wasn’t getting groggy quickly enough, so he gave me “a couple of beers” - a small dose of something uber-powerful through my canular. Then the pipe came out. Huge. Closed my eyes. Barely felt anything. Then, a rush of fluid in my chest and I started to cough. Then choke. Then he said it was time for sleep. My last thoughts: “I’m choking, I might die here…”

Waking up in recovery is horrid. You’re disorientated, confused, groggy and feeling miserable. Except now I felt something different. No pain at all in my mouth. I could swallow, pain free. Something worked.

To be honest, what happened next is all a bit unclear. A surgeon told me that the abscess had been taken out, along with my upper right and lower right wisdom teeth. I looked at the clock, and realised I had been under for probably near 2 hours.

The porter who took me down appeared with another patient. He knew I was upset about missing the game. He pointed at me and mouthed “one nil”. Nice afternoon for me then - we’d even won.

I asked for Rebecca to be called. Actually, I couldn’t remember her number off the top of my head, so it was my Mum who was called, who called her. Unusually they allowed her into recovery to see me. We were now just waiting for HDU. I realised then that I was in a HDU bed. Some poor bastards had had to lift me into it whilst I was asleep. Poor them. I hope their backs are OK.

I then got admitted into HDU. HDU is an odd place. They just want to watch you, watch everything you do, all of the time. They measure how much urine you produce. They write down every cough, every movement, and you are kept with a blood pressure cuff and pulse monitor on constantly to check your vitals all the time. I was also on humidified oxygen.

I slept little. You don’t really want to go to sleep if you know you have sleep apnea and you’ve come out from general anaesthetic - you’re worried you might die. During the night my oxygen levels went down to 70%. The nurses woke me a couple of times. In the morning, I was told it was serious enough that I should seek advice about it from my GP, but I was never at any point in any real danger - thankfully.

Then it was a waiting game to be discharged. Patients never get discharged from HDU, and so I was a freak occurrence. To one nurse’s mind, I was the first patient to get up, dress myself, and walk out of the doors of HDU she could remember. I’m glad I was able to.

Since then, I’ve only had to take two paracetamol all week. I am banned from smoking or drinking “fizzy drinks” for another week. The fizzy drink thing is to do with CO2 - bacteria near the site of the abscess and surgery will thrive on it, so no soda, lager or tonic water for me for a while.

On the whole, I’m fine. It was horrific, and I would never want to do it again, but that’s the story - scary as it was at the time - of how a toothache got out of hand, and I ended up on a high-dependency unit.

Long Term Life Tips: Top 5 Regrets People Make on their Deathbed:

An astonishing “top 5 list” blog comes to us via longtermtips and I’m pleased to say I’m pretty sure I won’t have any of these regrets when my time inevitably comes.

By Bronnie Ware (who worked for years nursing the dying)

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they…

Go read. It’s worth it. Then think on it.

Presuming I do not choke on a pretzel, drown in a gin and tonic or get run over by a minicab driver hurtling around the streets of Manchester in order to maximise his double fare revenues, I should see out 2011 in the next few hours.

Thank the invisible big man in the sky who probably isn’t there for that.

This year, I was hospitalised, my girlfriend broke her arm and spent 2 weeks waiting for surgery in hospital, and I missed almost every single deadline and objective I set for myself.

To say it has been an emotional, miserable year would be an understatement. Given the year before it we lost my grandmother to cancer and my business went under, it would be hard to call it my “worst year ever” but it’s dialled quite high on that scale.

Some silver linings though: I now have a job at a startup I love working with people whose company I enjoy and my probable financial situation 5 years from now looks very good indeed. Having more time at home with the girlfriend has been great, and it seems I’ve given up smoking again (I’ll consider myself truly a non-smoker sometime in February if I get there without another cig).

I don’t do “resolutions” normally, but I do have a few objectives:

• I need to get my weight down. I’m finally prepared to do something about it.
• I want to create more, so will aim to not go more than two or three consecutive days without working on something creative in 2012. It could be writing (here, for example), it could be code for a personal project, or it could be something I’ve never really tried before (music? art? Don’t know yet). I basically want to spend less time reading/consuming and more time doing stuff. David Tate provides excellent inspiration if you want to consider doing the same. I’ll try to document as much of that as possible here.
• I’m going to try and shift from always being behind/late for almost everything going on in my life, to being early. I don’t know how I’m going to do this, but I suspect if I can pull it off, I’ll be calmer and happier as a result.

And that’s all I’m aiming for in 2012: get healthier, lose some weight, create more, stop being late. They’re objectives, not resolutions, so can’t be broken. If I slip up, I’ll just crack on.

I really hope it’s enough to make 2012 better than 2011 and 2010. I’m overdue for a good year.

Dream about what you would wish for. It might come true.

This is not an exciting story, despite the title. But it’s true. And it happens to dozens of people every day, and is the reason why getting to work in London can sometimes take so long.

First, let me explain that this is not a story of me causing a fire alarm to go off, for anti-terrorist police to close a station for half an hour, or some dramatic incident that has left TfL seeking an ASBO against me.

This is a story that starts with a strap of a backpack. This strap, in fact:

This morning I caught a tube from Baron’s Court on the District Line heading East. Normally I change at South Kensington for a Circle Line to Moorgate, or hop off at Mansion House and walk up to the office through the City. This morning I had decided to stay on the District line until Blackfriars, and change there for a Circle line. It’s a man’s perogative, etc.

The tube this morning was very busy. During the Olympics it has on the whole been very quiet, but this morning it was the normal 8:15-8:45am peak time crush. I was stood right next to the door at the very front of the train, crushed in by about 20 other souls attempting to share the exact same square foot I was stood on.

At Victoria, as is often the way for the District Line, a lot of hustling and bustling went on as people fought their way out to the platform, and others tried to struggle onto the train. After around a minute, the doors closed.

Except for the one next to me. Looking down, it was jammed on my bag strap.

Swearing, I attempted to free it. It was jammed solid because the hydraulic pressure of the door was pushing against it, but not with sufficient force for the door to close. The guy next to me tried to help. The guy on the platform waiting for the next train also tried to help. Neither of us could free it. Moving it simply led to the door moving along a bit, keeping the strap jammed.

Then the sound of hydraulics releasing was heard, all the doors on the train went to open, and the driver climbed out of the cab. The release of pressure had allowed me to unjam the strap, and recover it into the train. The driver confirmed we were all fine, climbed back into the cab, closed the doors, and off we went.

I apologised to those around me for delaying their journey, even though the total delay was perhaps 60-90 seconds.

Then realised everybody else on the train was delayed, too.

Then a thought about queuing theory and a little knowledge about how loaded that line is with train traffic at that time of the morning hit me: I had delayed tens of thousands of people.

Let me explain how I worked this out.

The District Line is composed of rather large gauge trains. I estimate that conservatively, each train is capable of shifting 2,000 people during peak times. There were certainly at least 2,000 people on my train this morning. Yes, they are only 6 carriages each, but each is certainly capable of holding nearly 350 people, and frequently does. I’m prepared to revise my numbers down if shown evidence.

In addition, the District Line platforms are not just used by the District Line. They’re also used by the Circle line between Gloucester Road and Tower Hill.

A glance at any “passenger information display” on a platform along this part of the network during rush hour will tell you the mean time between trains is 1 minute. There are close to 60 trains an hour going along that piece of track during rush hour.

Because my train was delayed for over a minute, this must have caused the train behind it to be given a red signal. This in turn would have caused the train behind that to be given a red signal, and so on. This buffer effect would be dampened beyond Gloucester Road going West, because the Circle and District lines diverge, giving more time for the red signals to switch to green, meaning scheduled trains would not have to stop in an unscheduled manner.

However, there would have been at least - I think - 5 trains affected by this delay in addition to my own. So we’re now up to 12,000 people in total delayed by my bag strap jamming a door.

It gets worse.

I changed at Blackfriars to a Circle line train. I got off the train I had delayed, waited 60 seconds on the platform and got on the Circle line train immediately following it, obviously now delayed. Cautiously making sure my bag was far from any doors, I boarded aware this train was now at least 2 minutes late against schedule.

Satisfied at the figure I had come up with of around 12,000 delayed passengers, I had assumed I had done no more damage, until we got to Aldgate.

The tube system has a tendency to expect passengers always want to be moving all of the time. Any delay of more than a minute or two at a station is always explained via an announcement. As we sat at Aldgate, the driver announced we were being “regulated” by a red signal. Looking out of the window, I could see an East-bound Metropolitan line train crossing our tracks to head across to East London.

That’s when it hit me. We were “out of position”. The train was a couple of minutes late, and so the guys running the switching had decided to give priority to the Metropolitan Line train, and we were held for approximately 4-5 minutes.

Whilst this part of the Circle line between Aldgate and Tower Hill was not as busy as the District/Circle line Tower Hill back West, a 4 minute delay was enough to ensure that the train behind us was going to be red signalled waiting for us to clear the platform.

That would be enough for the train behind that to be stopped.

And that would be enough for the train behind that to be stopped, which would probably be on the shared part of the network. That would be enough to cascade across the whole part of that line back to Gloucester Road, causing delays to perhaps 12 trains in total.

By now the numbers per carriage were down a little as we were close to the end of peak, but there was probably at least 1,000 people per train out there. Rounding up for the few more probably still around the Victoria area, and we’re up to 25,000 people.

There’s obviously some fudging here - people boarding trains at the “correct time” for them, did not realise the train they were getting was in fact the one after the one they had expected, and they did not suffer any delay. But I also suspect that this effect wasn’t dampened until after the peak ended at around 9:30am, and there were people who boarded their trains at 8:30am or before still out there (it can take 60 minutes easily to get from the “end” of a line into central London), whose journey had taken at least a few minutes longer than normal.

I doubt many noticed. I doubt anybody cares.

But it did make me think about how queueing theory applies to real world problems, and how when TfL moan about people keeping coats, bags and belongings clear of the doors, or jamming the doors to squeeze on rather than wait 6 more minutes for the next train, that they might have a point.

If you cause a train to be delayed, you are not simply inconveniencing the dozen or so people glaring at you in your vicinity. Or the people on the rest of the train who would glare at you if they could. But in fact, you have a cascade effect down the rest of the network. Tens of thousands of people delayed, because you didn’t want to wait 5 minutes. Or because you didn’t keep an eye on your belongings near the door.

I’ll certainly be more careful in future.

The next time I’m sat waiting for a signal to clear or am told that we are “being regulated”, I’ll wonder about whose bag or foot was to blame, and how the numbers of people flowing through London make butterflies flapping their wings on the network capable of huge cascading effects on transport infrastructure.

In South Kensington they take their fashion so seriously, that if you find yourself on the District/Circle line platform wearing something untrendy, TfL have got you covered. 

Gap are a bit mainstream though. Surely a jumper from somewhere more boutique would have been more fitting?

I love knowing what my friends and family are up to. I love finding out about the latest thoughts going on within my peer groups. I enjoy reading many blogs, newsletter and emails. I used to regularly get over 400 emails a day including group/mailing list traffic, followed over a thousand people on Twitter and was friends with more than 250 people on Facebook. I subscribed to over 200 blogs. I read all of it, all the time.

Mix in LinkedIn, reddit, Hacker News and a few other corners of the web, and we’re suddenly talking about a lot of data flowing into my head.

I’m led to believe that some even value the contributions I make myself from time to time.

However, I’m about to start dialling all that down. I’ve made a start in some places, but over time I’m going to stop reading anywhere near as much short-form (twitter, Facebook, etc.), a little less medium-long form (blogs), and use the time to start reading longer form work again (books) and creating more.

The reason is not because of burn-out, cynicism or some other excuse: I’m not arguing that it’s all pointless, and I’m not being a Luddite. I just want to create more, and there are only so many hours in the day.

This was prompted by going back over my resolutions posted here in December, and realising I’ve made little progress:

• I need to get my weight down. I’m finally prepared to do something about it.

• I want to create more, so will aim to not go more than two or three consecutive days without working on something creative in 2012. It could be writing (here, for example), it could be code for a personal project, or it could be something I’ve never really tried before (music? art? Don’t know yet). I basically want to spend less time reading/consuming and more time doing stuff. David Tate provides excellent inspirationif you want to consider doing the same. I’ll try to document as much of that as possible here.

• I’m going to try and shift from always being behind/late for almost everything going on in my life, to being early. I don’t know how I’m going to do this, but I suspect if I can pull it off, I’ll be calmer and happier as a result.

This, I am happy to report, seems to have actually happened for the most part. Public transport not withstanding - including my own self-sabotage - I tend to be where I need to be on-time (or early), far more than I was last year.

Back to the main point: by reading what’s going on out there, by trying out new apps, by listening to all these voices, I am feeling engaged and plugged in, but only as a consumer. The purpose of the Internet is not to simply consume but to create, amend, edit, destroy, vandalise and promote. Ideas, content, products, whatever.

Also, am I the only one who has noticed how exhausting this hosepipe of information can be on a daily - even hourly - basis? I’m tired of consuming. It’s worse than television - at least with television an editor or commissioner has attempted to do some curation.

So I’m not departing, I’m not shutting down accounts, I’m just going to read a great deal less online, to the point the relevant apps might disappear off my phone. In return, I should be able to produce a few new things to share. Watch this space!